Invites & Tryouts Motherkao loves... Product Reviews Reviews The Kao Kids Uncategorized

Pretty, sticky and lasting [Stickerkid review]

May 22, 2014

The kids’ personalised stickers which I got from those push cart stalls in the mall have been failing me. These days, we can’t even recognise what’s being printed on the labels. Thankfully, they are at the age where they are indicating their preferences more strongly than ever, so we know what belongs to who by colour and design preferences, like their water bottles. The confusion begins when things are identical, like school bags, uniforms and colour pencils.

The label that failed me, which also means a waste of money

And it’s as if Stickerkid picked up my distress signal, and offered to send some personalised labels my way for the Kao kids.

Stickerkid is an online store that designs and produces high quality Swiss-made personalised labels from stickers for belongings and identification bracelets to photo name labels. The company was founded in 2004 and has printed millions of premium quality labels for thousands of parents and their children all over the world. We were really blessed to be given a fully sponsored code to customise a one-line personalised label for our belongings, as well as iron-ons for all the three kids.

It didn’t take us long to go online and choose the colours and fonts that we wanted, and the kids each had a say of their labels’ font colour and background colour.

The kids took turns to sit in front of my lap top to personalise their sticker labels

And when they arrived in the mail two weeks ago, they were thrilled! Immediately, they started labelling their favourite things…

60 small stickers for each Kao kid from Stickerkid!

“Hands off, these are mine!”: I am echoing the sentiments of these kids here

And I took it upon myself to label their identical looking pencils to prevent more fights from breaking out…

Identical things like these MUST be labelled in this house so that a war doesn’t break out

As well as rid their water bottles of their previous useless labels and putting on new ones.

The kids chose their favourite colours for their labels which incidentally are the same colours of their water bottles!

The kids chose their favourite colours for their labels which incidentally are the same colours as their water bottles!

Clearly, the biggest difference between those roadside-pushcart-pseudo-Disney name labels and those from Stickerkid is the fact that the quality of the stickers really IS better. I hear these stickers survive the microwave, the dishwasher, water, sun and sand. I’ve waited two weeks to write this review to see if the labels would fade and drop off from the kids’ water bottles that go through a good deal of scrubbing once a day, and I am pleased to say that they haven’t! I also stuck them on fabric (the kids’ school bags) and the labels have stayed there since the day I pasted them on.

I stuck the labels on the kids’ school bag made of tough fabric and the adhesive in each label is amazingly strong

And although their iron-on labels for clothes may not be the prettiest, they apparently are made to last for a really long time – as long as at least 45 washings in 60ºC. With these labels ironed on, I no longer have to spend time squinting at faded size tags at the back of their PE t-shirts (Becks is S and Ben is M) when I get them ready for school. Any time saved is good time saved, I say.

What a relief to have these !

I’m really happy to have Stickerkids help personalise the kids’ stuff. Their labels are extremely affordable and value for money, and saves me time and prevents fights. These little stickers are really something.

Thank you, Stickerkid, for sending these goodies our way and making the Kao kids really happy with these pretty things!

***

If you’d like to check out Stickerkid and see for yourself how good their labels are, you can get a 10% discount by quoting the discount code “MotherKao2014“ when you check out! This promotion for Motherkao readers is valid till 30 June 2014.

Disclosure: Motherkao received no monetary compensation for this review. The labels (3 sets of small stickers and 3 sets of iron-ons) were sponsored, courtesy of Stickerkids. All opinions here are my own.

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Invites & Tryouts Motherkao loves... Reviews

Getting a splashlight at the new Salon Vim

May 21, 2014

If you’re a regular reader of this blog, you’d know that we’ve had a challenging three weeks being without live-in help and I’ve gone almost crazy handling the chores, the kids and myself.

So when the helper came and I saw that she was settling ok, I applied for leave from my boss to go get me some me-time. Of course, my lovely boss said yes, and took over my duties for an evening while I headed to the new Salon Vim at 313 Somerset. For a while now, my stylist has been asking me to come check out the latest L’oreal Spring/Summer 2014 Collection, and I have been seeing pretty pictures of gorgeous hair on Salon Vim’s FB page that I can only wish I have – because seriously, which stay-home mom has got time to colour + perm + treat her hair? It takes at least four hours for one of those, and the only time I get four hours to myself on a typical day is after 10pm after the kids go to bed.

Someone should totally start a 24-hour salon; they might get business from stay-home moms like me.

Anyway.

I happily scooted off to 313 Somerset with a rare opportunity of having four hours to myself and found the new Salon Vim at the same level they used to be at (Level 4). And my, their new place is HUGE. It boasts of double the capacity as compared to their previous place and a VIP room (which I was ushered into!) which is cosy, quiet and super comfortable. My stylist, Ymond, took a look at the condition of my hair and declared I needed a trim, a new colour and a hair and scalp treatment – and immediately got to work.

Salon Vim at their new home (Picture credit: Salon Vim)

He also asked if I would like to go bold and try out the new look called splashlight, which involved selecting a portion of hair to be coloured with a loud, contrasting colour against a base colour. Something like this:

Making a statement with splashlights (Picture credit: Salon Vim)

Oooh, that would add some excitement to my life, certainly.

He selected magenta red to be “splashed” under a tuft of hair on my left side, and mocha brown as the base colour. While he was mixing and prepping, I was praying I wouldn’t end up looking like Ronald McDonald or Marilyn Manson on a bad hair day. I mean, have you seen how red the dye is?

Magenta red in the making

Clearly, my worries were unfounded, because this, ladies and gentlemen, this was the gorgeous result:

From aunty to chic

I like that it’s not-in-your-face loud. I’ve got nothing I want to prove anyway. I like it that, on me, it turns me from aunty-looking to sophisticated chic with a statement that’s classy not angsty.

I like. I like how this splashing of highlights turned out.

Photo time with the hair

I also had a hair and scalp keratin treatment, courtesy of Salon Vim, after the colouring was done, and it was nice to be *finally* flipping through fashion and women magazines after so long. The last time I did so was when I went to Salon Vim for my sombre highlights and soft perm in January. It’s been a while.

Some pampering of the tresses is long overdue, I say

All in all, it was a happy me-time I had with myself. I’m happy with time alone, happy with the change, happy to get some red carpet treatment and happy to have a bolder new look. Salon Vim is really the place to go to if you want experienced hands who’s skilled in stylish colouring techniques, and a place to check out for the latest trends and styles.

Thank you, Salon Vim, for once again inviting me, and for pampering a tired mother silly!

With Ymond Chin, the stylist that made it all happen!

More details:

Starting from 26 May 2014 for 2 weeks, Salon Vim is offering a 50% discount off their hair and scalp treatment! For $125 (U.P $250), get fussed and pampered while your hair and scalp get royal treatment.

And just for Motherkao readers, Salon Vim is taking 15% off your bill* when you pay them a visit for any hair services! Quote [Motherkao blog] or [Elizabeth from Motherkao] when you make an appointment at 68847757 | 68847767 or email them at vimsalon@yahoo.com.sg. Connect with them via their Facebook page to check out the latest hair creations and get inspired.

Salon Vim by Chez Vous is at 313 @ Somerset Orchard Road #04-25/28, Singapore 238895

*The 15% discount is limited to first time Salon Vim customers only.

Disclosure: I was invited to Salon Vim to try out their services for the purpose of this review. No monetary compensation was received for this post and opinions here are my own.

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(Self) Examination Family life as we know it Milestones and growing up The Kao Kids Thunderstorm days

My kids don’t think I’m great anymore

May 20, 2014

A few days ago, I hit an all-time low in my SAHM-hood. I was inconsolable (and still am now) and had to mope around for a couple of days before bracing myself to write this post.

It all started with this book:

I’ve read this book to the kids like what, more than 10 times at least, since we had it and the children enjoy the pictures and the heartwarming story in this book by Giles Andreae about all the reasons why the little boy loves his mummy.

The book ends with this, and usually, we’d end our reading of this story with a big group hug and the kids telling me how much they love me:

Until a few nights ago when the kids told me, after the story ended, (and I quote Ben and Becks) that their mummy “is not that great” because “she canes us and shouts at us” and that their mummy is more “lousy” than the mummy in the book who is “so fun” to play with.

When I asked them to explain further and asked if their mommy caned and scolded them for no reason (I spoke as the third person), they said, “Our mummy cane us because we are naughty. But why must she do that? Just tell us nicely lah!”

And even after explaining that it’s a mummy’s role to discipline her children – and even the Bible says that sometimes we need to use the rod to chase foolishness away from a child – they still believed that kind of mummy is “not a good mummy”, not like the one in the book we read so often.

After being exasperated for a while, instead of breaking down as I should with tears already welling up in my eyes, I threw a big adult tantrum, told them to go to bed and to find another mummy. I hinted that I may go back to full-time work afterall, because it seemed like my being around them was not appreciated.

Both of them looked at me, with their eyes wide open, and asked me where they can buy a new mummy. Becks also asked if I could go back to work and hire more aunties to take care of them instead.

***

Quite a blow for the stay-home mum ego, isn’t it? Needless to say, I was horribly shaken by what the kids talked about, and what they could conceive in their minds – that they actually wanted to buy a new mum or even entertained the thought of getting others to replace their mum. At that moment I felt that my two years of sacrifice of staying home has all been for nought. Clearly, they are taking the mum presence for granted; they are seeing me around too much to be actually feeling some tinges of contempt that come with familiarity. I mean, if I were working full time, we’d probably treasure those few hours of seeing one another after a day’s work a lot more. I’ll probably scold them less, let them get away with a lot more things, and make the helper clean up after them more often than not.

Because of the fact that I’ve stayed home, and the recent episode of being maid-less for almost three weeks, they’re witnessing before their eyes how their own mother handles stress and adjusts to the unpredictable situations that life throws our way (which isn’t the best, of course); plus the fact that they are at the age where child-training has to take place so that they learn to be independent, I also tend to do more nagging and scolding than praising and encouraging (which is entirely the way I’ve been wired).

And have you seen the way the kids just complete ignore me whenever I give instructions like “Pack up your toys”, “Don’t litter Lego blocks on the floor”, “Please wear your shoes and get ready to go” and I get at least a whole ten minutes of lag time? Which is TOTALLY ANNOYING. I don’t know what else to do but to raise my voice and holler so that I can get things going.

So the kids think this is totally uncool and that Mama is lousy compared to the storybook mum who probably never yells at her kiddo and always smothers him with cuddles.

***

So, as I was saying, I moped around for some time before finally sitting down to write this. I did a lot of thinking after hearing what the kids said to me. It’s true, motherhood really sometimes brings out the worst in me. I scare myself on those days when I lose it; and I probably would never know this awful side of me if I hadn’t stayed home. It makes me wonder if this is all worth it. I could take the easy way out, spoil them silly and just leave the care-giving to full-day daycare. I mean, that is SO doable. I tell you, working (where I previously came from) is definitely much easier than being home with three young children. Why am I doing this, having to show my worst to the kids on crazy days where there’s chores to be done, disobedient children screaming the house down, tantrums to handle, crayons littering the floor, urine stains on the toilet bowl and toilet paper stuffed in every visible corner in the house?

What’s the point?

Of course, it is also silly to take the things that a five-year-old and four-year-old say too seriously. Why, they are children, and they’d say the darndest anyway. The adult at the receiving end should be bigger, in every sense of the word, and be the bigger, better person in handling the “feedback” and be tough enough to soldier on. Afterall, these are the things a mother has to bear.

***

The kids have assured me that they still love me, and Ben has, through tears, told me that he wants me to stay home still. He seems to fear that I might chuck him in childcare and never caring for him ever again; and I am mindful not to say things that would scar him. Becks still wants me to go back to work, because that to her will solve the “Mama has no money” problem, and so she says, which means I can buy her lots of things to eat and stuffed toys to play with, something which her present thrifty stay-home mother does not indulge her in.

I guess it’s still onward with this stay-home journey, albeit with a little discouragement. I’m choosing to believe that I can try to be a nicer person when stress gets in my way and that the kids were probably stressed out too the past three weeks of us being without live-help such that they don’t like the mother that has become the horrible-always-barking-Mom-maid that they are seeing.

It must have been also tough for them to have to put up with me the past weeks.

At least, I am still loved. Even though I am horrible.

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Close encounters with the maid kind Family life as we know it Milestones and growing up The Kao Kids

No more maid woes (for now) – phew!

May 19, 2014

Life’s back to normal at last.

We’ve been without live-in help for 3 weeks and let’s just say, although it’s a good thing to be hands-on once in a while and do everything ourselves, there are mundane chores that can be outsourced so that time can be better spent doing more meaningful things. Afterall, what’s the use of folding clothes for the third time in the day with the kids, and having to re-fold what you tasked them to do because they still can’t do the folding properly just yet?

These 3 weeks have been nothing but exhausting. It’s not so much of the chores, if I come to think of it, it’s more of having to put up with the whining, the sticking (these are clingy children sometimes) and constant quibbling with NO ONE in the day to share your load.

I was supposed to be only maid-less for about a week, but something happened to the domestic helper who came recommended. She chickened out at the medical examination back in her home country; I heard she grabbed her suitcase and was never heard of again. So much for having cold feet.

After receiving this bad news, I looked through a couple more bio datas and interviewed some promising ones only to be rejected in my face. These days, for help that comes from a particular nationality, they choose you instead of vice versa. I seem to fall into the category of being the worst in the lot: three young children, no maid room to offer, employer (that is me) stays home (and so can watch her like a hawk); that plus I also requested that the helper be compensated for off days for the first year which made the search even trickier. Fatherkao was joking that we’d probably get people willing to work for us when our youngest turns 7, when we move to a landed property and when I return to a full-time job.

Bah.

So after some time of praying and hoping, someone finally agreed to come, and we were more than happy to have her. Our present domestic helper came last week and I am glad to say, she’s a great extension of my hands and feet. She came and cleaned and the last I know, everything from the kitchen larder to book shelves and toy boxes have been sorted and organised. There are no more communication breakdowns and I don’t have to teach her to do anything (she can read instruction manuals, labels, and knows how to operate appliances, thank God!). She can practically run the household now, and can even have conversations with the children and read them story books. Becks has been waking up early to be with her, asking her to tie her hair and reading her her princess stories, and although I have to share my children’s love with someone else now, it’s great to be doing my own things once in a while.

So excuse me while I go sip some coffee. I’ve been gulping my cuppas down for 3 weeks and it’s nice to be finally tasting my lattes.

Life just got better.

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I ♥ lists Milestones and growing up Parenting 101 The Kao Kids What to Expect... As a Mother

The A-Z Guide to staying home

May 13, 2014

This is the second year I’m staying home and it’s been nothing but crazy still. Many people have asked me how I survive on a daily basis, and what my secret is. I wish I could say vodka, but heh no, I don’t drink and have yet to give that to my kids to knock them out.

Although that’s a really tempting thought on really insane days.

Well, I’m still surviving (but barely breathing!) and I’m joining The Gingerbread Mum‘s blog train where she invited 31 stay-home moms to share their survival tips – one mom for each day for the month of May.

So here’s my very own tips – from A-Z – featuring all the things I do / use / need to make it through the madness. There’s no secret, really, but I hope some things in this list can help you make it through each day as they have helped me make it through mine.

You’re welcome.

Motherkao’s A-Z Guide to Staying Home: things you will need and places you must go

Activity books

Activity books can keep young children occupied for quite a while; even the littlest would colour away happily whenever he gets one. Value for money, and great investment in exchange for at least 5 minutes of silence (and longer if the kid is older). You can get these for less than $4 at fairs and mobile booths in shopping malls

I keep the kids iPad and iPhone-free with these

Balloons

Believe it or not, I buy balloons from the party section in the supermarket. I buy many packets and use balloons to distract the littlest and to break up fights. I get the kids to choose a colour and they love to watch in anticipation while I blow each balloon, one by one, and then I make them volley the balloons and chase them. And while they do that, I can catch a shut-eye for a minute at least.

Chocolates

I stash a few boxes of After Eight in the fridge and sneak a few pieces in my mouth whenever I feel I’m losing it. You already know chocolates are a great cure for depression and insanity, right?

Disney Junior

Channel 311 on Starhub TV, oh, that’s a godsend babysitter. The kids like almost everything on it, from Doc McStuffins and Sophia the First to Jake and the Neverland Pirates and Mickey Mouse Clubhouse. Now that we’re without a helper, this channel gives me my toilet break and some me-time in the shower. For another awesome babysitter recommendation, refer to the Letter N.

Espresso machine

One of the best things in our kitchen and worth every single cent we sunk in. Think the smell of coffee filling the air in the mornings and freshly brewed lattes that are kind to the stomach. I’ve said goodbye to 3-in-1 and its horrible aftertaste forever since we bought one. If coffee makes you happy, consider investing. We use a Philips Saeco.

Foot rubs

I don’t get to go for these anymore at those koyok-smelling places in the heartlands. No time, no money to buy packages anyway. But I give myself these rubs on my feet once in a while with nice smelling essential oils for a perk-me-up. FYI: your two big toes are connected to your cerebrum so remember to rub hard and press in when you think you’re losing your head.

Grapes

Best.fruit.ever. to give to kids. No need to cut, no need to wash plates or utensils. Just give them a good rinse with skin on and kids get vitamins, fibre and natural sugar.

Husband!

This word deserves a thousand exclamation marks if space allows. He’s your tag-team partner and the one who has to bear all your complaints after a hard day of you staying home. Be nice to him (so he’ll be ready to listen and empathise), always ask how his day was first, and squeeze his shoulders for a bit before you unload.

H is for Husband, the best tag-team partner ever

Ikea’s Småland

Ever since Nat can enter this place (he’s finally 92cm!), I’ve been going there at least once a month to “deposit” the kids while I get at least one hour of me-time and some coffee. Sometimes, I bring a friend who brings her kids and both of us get some adult conversations while the kids play. The best part of this all: IT’S FREE!

Juice

Best “distracting” beverage for the kids – I pour this out a lot whenever they whine for something sweet or I have to throw away candies from goodie bags they get from school. I exaggerate the number of fruits / veggies that they can taste from one sip of the juice – blueberries! grapes! carrots! peaches! apples! – even though it’s usually ‘Mixed Berries’ that they drink (two 1-litre packs for $3.95 from Marigold) and the kids start salivating. Add some ice cubes to make it like a treat! Works wonders every time!

Kdramas

This keeps me going when the going gets rough: the thought of being able to catch one episode – any episode – of something from kdramaland with enough hotness in it after the kids are in bed (Lee Min-ho, I’m looking at you!). Many sites have come, and gone – and failed me – but I’ve found DramaGo and DramaFire to be the most stable for now.

Cannot miss the chance to put a picture of HOT on my blog like a crazy fan girl

Cannot miss the chance to put a picture of HOTNESS on my blog like a crazed fan girl

Library

Place to go where you don’t have to put the books back and organise them by genres (me to OCD self). Place to go when you need to escape from sweltering heat. Place to go so kids can be awed by just how many books there are and to sit comfortably to read. Best place to visit during the school holidays to keep kids occupied.

Mom rules

I have these rules for myself to follow as much as I can. They guide me in the day-to-day handling of the kids and my role as their mother.

Nick Junior

Channel 304! Another terrific babysitter. My kids love this more than the one you read about at the Letter D. I find this channel more educational, slower in pace of moving images, and more engaging. I do still try to limit TV time (but it’s becoming increasingly tough these 2 weeks with no helper) but I really wouldn’t mind them catching the 15-minute segments of the many good shows on this channel – Go, Diego, Go!, Dora the Explorer, Bubble Guppies, Wonder Pets and Ni Hao Kai Lan.

One-pot meals

These help me save time and yet give the kids a meal. I throw frozen prawns, frozen corn and canned pineapples with pineapple rice paste in the rice cooker and we get pineapple rice for dinner. I throw some ribs and lotus in the slow cooker and we get soup. I put in chicken, carrots, potatoes and mushrooms and we get stew. Easy peasy lemon squeezy!

Playground

When I see the kids getting restless and sense that they need to expend their energy a little, I head on down to the nearest neighbourhood playground. Now that the kids are older, I leave them to play and climb and run while I sit and stone on the bench. Keeps me sane in the evenings too.

Quiet time

Now with the Bible app on my phone, I read the verse of the day and meditate on it throughout the day. For me, it really is crucial to spend time praying. Like the saying goes, prayer IS really the best way to draw strength from heaven.

Running Man

Ooooh! I am addicted to this, and like what you’d read while at the Letter K, the thought of being able to unwind with this after the kids go to bed keeps me going when the going gets tough. On particularly bad days, I find myself needing to watch this to have a good laugh before I sleep. I laugh out loud heartily (this variety show is just TOO funny!), release all the tension of the day, and when I finally feel that the stress is all gone, I go to sleep happy. Running Man *Hwaiting!* !

I catch my Running Man episodes here

Singapore Mom Bloggers

I belong to this wonderful closed group called Singapore Mom Bloggers and we have meaningful virtual connections and friendships online. I share and rant there, and seek advice a lot from the mothers in the group, and having these moms as my friends keeps me sane on crazy stay-home days.

Terminal 3

If the kids need space to run; if you need a decent place to eat out on weekends but don’t want to queue for that long (compared to places in town); if you need to dream of a holiday; if your kids want to be monkeys without you being judged, head on down to Terminal 3. This is our place to go on weekends; and my kids monkey around at the viewing gallery together with many other kids while the parents look out at planes and plan their next getaway.

Updates

I have stopped feeling guilty of scrolling my phone to check status updates on FB and Instagram. Why, I need to connect with people too, I face the kids almost 24/7, y’unno.

Verbal diarrhea

Known fact: women de-stress by talking. Talking helps them connect. Talking helps them unwind. So talk. Talk to husband. Talk to children. Talk to children’s stuffed toys. Talk to children’s school teachers. Talk to furniture. Talk to self. Talk to cleaners, pump attendants, service staff at restaurants and cashiers. TALK. It ALWAYS makes you feel better. Just make sure you won’t have to put your foot in your mouth while at that.

Water play

For hot days. For days they refuse to get in the bath. For days when I need 15 minutes to chill with a cup of tea. I turn on a trickle, throw in lots of plastic cups, bottles, bottle caps, and pails and get them to play while I sit outside the toilet with my cup of tea and watch them. Fun at a small price, and will certainly continue if PUB doesn’t increase our utility fees.

Or places like these also can:

Free fountain fun at Greenwich V

Xerox-ing

Having a printer that can photocopy is extremely helpful. I zap things for the kids to do again and again, like their favourite colouring pages and activity mazes. If you own one of those Grolier Logico sets, the back of each card has an activity which you can xerox for the kids to try.

Young Living’s Essential oils

I’ve tried essential oils from Young Living for close to 6 months now and I am one happy convert. I oil the kids’ soles – and mine and Fatherkao’s – religiously and use the oils for various ailments and aches. They work great for me, by the way, especially Peace & Calming, which soothes me much after a tiring day with the kids.

Zoo (and the River Safari)

Our two default places to go if the weather is good and I have energy (the River Safari is fully sheltered, by the way). These two places never fail to thrill the Kao kids, and they just love the idea of being there looking at animals. Favourite hangouts: Frozen Tundra, Giant Pandas’ Den and Rainforest Kidz World. Oh yes, I’ve calculated that the zoo family membership is worth it if you visit at least 6 times a year. And also, this is the place to go during the school holidays if you’ve run out of things to do.

Love the cool at Kai Kai and Jia Jia’s den at the River Safari

There you have it, a list from A to Z! My favourites are the letters H, K and R. What are yours?

~~~

The next mom on the blog train is Summer, who blogs at A Happy Mum. Summer is a media executive turned SAHM from Singapore who stepped into the gratifying journey of motherhood during her four-year stay in Sweden. It was then she realised that this was her destiny all along and she is now the mother of two lovely girls. She believes that contentment is bliss and that happiness is about making the best of what you have. A Happy Mum is a place where she blogs about motherhood, babies, love, DIY crafts, travelling and all things happy. Join her tomorrow as she shares a heartfelt post on how she maintains her emotional well-being as a SAHM.

Need more survival tips? Read them all here from all of us on The Gingerbread Mum’s Blog Train!

This post is part of a blog train hosted by The Gingerbread Mum where 31 stay-at-home mums share their survival tips. We hope that you’ll find our tips useful and remember that you’re not alone!

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Happy days The real supermom

What’s your bragging right?

May 10, 2014

Are you a mother? If you are, you’ve definitely earned your right to brag. To celebrate motherhood this Mother’s Day, I’m featuring some of the most awesome mothers I know who’s got every entitlement to boast about the person they’ve become and the things they have accomplished ever since becoming moms.

And because it’s Mother’s Day, let’s give it up for these wonderful women who tirelessly labour to love their children and who’s taken on this challenging role of nurturing relationships within their families… *APPLAUSE PLEASE!*

~~~

1. Adeline Oon – blogs at The Accidental Mom Blogger, mother of two, aged 14 and 12

“I used to be rather meek before I had children, you wouldn’t have possibly known that I can amplify my voice ten times more when I lost sight of my kids at the mall, when they were much younger.”

2. Joey Wong – blogs at Joey Craftworkz and mother of two kids, aged 4 and 1

“I used to be timid and shy in crowded places and hardly spoke out loud. After I became a mom, my skin ‘thickened’ so much more and I’m not embarrassed when the kids cry out loud. I am also able to nurse publicly with a nursing cover inside train.”

3. Mabel Lee – blogs at Amazingly Still and mother of two kids, aged 3 years and 17 months

“I used to be very dependent on external help, but certain things and people can be very unreliable. So when push came to shove, I realized I can do just about anything, as long as I want to. My motto ever since I became a mother is ‘Cannot also must can!’ Even when it means surviving on 1-2 hours of sleep (should it be called naps instead?) or on instant food daily in the earlier stages of motherhood.

Oh, and… I didn’t know I have super human strength until I brought both kids to the park on my own, and had to carry both home by the end of it. And that was just the start of carrying them both on my own while we’re out cos’ Blake says, ‘Mommy so strong. Carry!’ “

3. Alicia – blogs at Beanie N Us and mom to 5.5 year-old Dumpling

“Ever since becoming a mom, I realised that I have quite a few super powers. I can multi-task: cook up a storm while shouting over my shoulder, listening to and correcting the kiddo while she practises on her violin. I am also a world-class nag and a full-time working homeschooling mum who teaches the little one English, Math and Science, in the evenings, while revising Chinese with her whenever we can.”

4. Klessis, mom behind The J Babies and mother to two beautiful girls

“For a period of three years when my first daughter was three months old till she was three, I would push her in a stroller to my office (where her nursery was). I would take a 15-minute walk from home to MRT station, take a 50-minute train ride then walk another 15 minutes to reach office everyday. The walking journey to office covers a total of 6 escalators and the escalators were often faulty! My arms became very muscular during that period of time from carrying the strollers up and down the stairs! That was the most tedious thing I’ve done since I became a mom.”

5. Janice, mom blogger at Mish.Mash.Mess and mom to 2.5 year-old Little K

“Being a mom made me realise my potential hidden in the abyss which I wouldn’t have known if not for this role. The extent to which I can go for the kid – breastfeeding, sleepless nights, preparing homeschooling materials till past midnight and waking up early next day, cook lunch, chauffeur kid to school before heading to work… all this made even more difficult with a bun in the oven and very little help around. It’s exhausting but rewarding.”

6. Dominique – blogs at Dominique’s Desk and mom of three kids, aged 10, 7 and 3

“I’ve developed many wonder powers since becoming a mom and they multiply each time a kid is born. I can cook a five-course meal within an hour while at the same time supervising the kids while they are doing their homework in the hall.”

7. Connie, mom of two, aged 7 and 2 (plus one more on the way!), blogs at RayConnieBaby

“My threshold for pain… I chose to give birth to my two kids without epidural and what’s more, gave birth to my daughter without medical help right in the hospital!”

8. Waiwai, mom behind Peipei.Haohao, and mom to the two kids her blog is named after, aged 4 and 5

“Prepare a meal, guide my daughter to revise for spelling test, build a Lego house for my son, go to toilet to do ‘big business’. All done in 30 minutes.”

9. Li-Mei – blogs at Finally Mama and mom to a two-and-a-half year-old boy

“After miscarriages and setbacks, I am a happy mama to a 2.5 year-old boy, a 1.5 year-old company called ‘The Whiz Times’ and praying for baby number two to come soon!”

10. Ling Siew, mom behind The View from Mama’s Desk and mom to two active boys aged 3 and 4.5

“Ever since I became a mom, I became better at multi-tasking: I can cook lunch, arbitrate fights, listen to two separate conversations, supervise homework, get the washing machine going all at the same time; and getting lunch on the table in under 20 minutes.”

11. Cen-Lin Ting, mom of two boys, aged 1 and 4.5 years old and blogs at Miracule

“Many cannot believe I can be a SAHM and even family members are worried if I can cope, but here I am, a mom of two, and I single-handedly manage the household chores on my own too! I also took up gardening at the community garden! I am proud to tell others I am the week-day driver, cook, maid, mom, educator and farmer!”

12. Mrs Kam, mom behind The Kam Family and mother of two, aged 4.5 and 6

“One of the many things that I embark on to achieve healthy living, is that my children go medicine-free. Both of them have been medicine-free for almost four years – no fever medicine, no cough medicine and antibiotics – they fight all the bugs naturally and recover very fast.”

13. Jenn, mother of a 7.5 year-old boy and blogger at Mylilbookworm

“Being career-minded, I never knew I could give up my promising job for a baby. I enjoy my current lifestyle so much that, after 7 years, I wouldn’t want to go back working in the corporate world anymore.”

14. Serene, mom blogger at Xavvylicious and mother of two, aged 6 years old and 9 months old

“Given my ‘cannot sit still’ character, I hated to stay in a place the whole day, not to mention staying at home! Even jobs that I used to have had me running on the ground. I have never imagined myself as an SAHM and am proud to tell everyone I DID IT! From things which I have never done in the first 26 years in my life to being able to perform it well with minimal help – cooking, homeschooling, crafting, baking, blogging, breastfeeding anytime, anywhere and being always out andabout with a pram and a diaper bag, with two kids!”

15. Elizabeth Soh-Teo, blogger at The Little Bow Girl and mother to 6-week-old Sophie Rose

“Less than two months ago before my baby arrived I was a different person – very vain and also very awkward about making friends. After becoming a mom (albeit a super new one) I can tolerate milk, vomit, spit, poo all over my new clothes without blinking an eyelid and give my baby a kiss instead. I now dare to make friends everywhere I go, from nursing rooms to baby clothes departments. Since being the grateful recipient of a disposable diaper from a stranger (we had packed too few), I try to pass on the favour and offer diapers/wipes/ a helping hand whenever I see that other changing room mummies have run out or struggling with an extra child. It’s a whole new world.”

16. Cherie, full-time working mom of two boys aged 3 and 1, and blogs at Cherieladie

“I never liked kids. I cannot bring myself to coo at any baby, or carry them and I would try to stay as far away as possible whenever I can. But I knew that I would definitely want my own kids some day. Now, with two kids. I guess I somewhat “survived” but I still cannot stand the noise they make.”

17. Hui Ing, mom behind Ingspirations, and mother of three, aged 8, 6 and 3

“I was a clean freak until I became a mom. Now, wiping poo, cleaning up vomit, even catching vomit with my bare hands is no big deal. On a less gross note, I discovered my multi-tasking powers which I never knew existed!”

18. Angie S, mom to Dana, aged 6 and blogger behind Princess Dana Diaries

“Being a mom has helped me become more aware of my own inadequacies and character flaws. It amplified my need to become less self-reliant and more dependent on God’s grace, wisdom and favour to parent this daughter whom He has blessed us with. It has made me a better person. From someone who was independent all her life since primary school, it’s been a great ride and I can say with all my heart that I would never trade being a mom for anything in the world.”

19. Amie, full-time working mother of three kids and blogger at Mamamie’s Thots

“Before I became a mum, I dislike driving and I’m very bad at remembering those road names or places I’ve been to. Ever since these three kids came into my life, I have to learn how to overcome my problem by being their full-time chauffeur and fetch them to and from school and enrichment classes.”

20. Jiahui, full-time working mom of three kids, aged 9, 7 and 6 and mom blogger behind Mum’s the Word

“The last nine years taught me that there is really power in my words. Everything I say is caught by the kids, my words taken ransom, my promises brought to remembrance, my theories stripped apart. I learnt to use my words to speak life into my kids, speak blessings and hope. They taught me to slow down and think before I speak. They showed me that words can shape lives.”

21. Jac, blogs at The Little Mom and mother of two

“I never knew I can smell someone’s butt in public or “study” someone else’s poo. Or striking a conversation with another stranger to share some tips. Or worst sharing my ice-cream with not one but two persons until I became a mom!”

22. Edlyn, mother of three and blogger behind Mummy Ed

“I have not slept in six years.”

23. And last, but not least… Motherkao, mother of three kids aged 5, 4 and 2 and blogger behind this blog you’re now reading

“I did three kids in four years and my body has never really gotten any rest since 2009. I chauffeur, cook and clean. I’m totally hands-on. I left my job to be there for them every minute of their lives. I am now with them 24/7 (almost!) and have never once missed a single tuck-in. No, not even one night.”

~~~

What about you? What’s your bragging right? Go on, I’ll let you brag – share them with me in the comments below!

“If I had no children, my house would be clean and my wallet would be full; but then my heart would be empty.”

Picture credit: comicbookschool.com

Happy Mother’s Day!

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Close encounters with the maid kind Family life as we know it I ♥ lists The Kao Kids The real supermom Thunderstorm days

3 lists, 30 things, 7 days

May 6, 2014

It’s Day 7 since I sent the helper back to the agency after she demonstrated how weak-willed and unwilling to work she was. It’s the longest I’ve ever been without a helper since I’ve had three kids, and it’s going to be this way a while more at least.

There’s just one word to describe it all.

EXHAUSTING.

On the brighter side of things, I now have a list of 10 things I never really say but now say so very often, 10 things I’ve discovered since maid-less, and 10 things I am eternally grateful for. I’m exhausted, but that ain’t gonna stop me from making lists, and more lists.

~~~

10 things I never really say, but say so often now:

1. “I’m ONLY ONE person now, kids. So please (fill in the blanks).” Usually it’s “cooperate”, “do it yourself”, “help me out here” or “follow instructions quickly”.

2. “Do I look like I’ve got an extra pair of hands or legs?” This is usually in response to the kids making requests like finding a lost toy or picking a book off a shelf they can’t reach – and always at a time when I am unavailable to help. I now make them solve their problems – by taking a stool, using a torch, and getting help from the other siblings.

3. “My back is breaking.” Self-explanatory. Said whenever I feel my back is breaking. Which is very often.

4. “Seriously. Like seriously.” Said whenever the kids start fighting for my attention or squabble amongst themselves whenever I am at my busiest.

5. “Sorry I can’t sayang / hug / cuddle / kiss you now. My hands are full of soap.” The kids always seem to have a boo-boo for me to kiss whenever I am washing the dishes.

6. “Can you please wait? I can only do one thing at a time.” I can’t dry three wet kids at the same time but it’s always the same time they want to get out of the bath. And they get really upset who gets to be towel-dried first.

7. “Want to watch TV?” I usually never offer much but ever since we became maid-less… It was something that had to be so that I can cook / hang the laundry / do the dishes / wash the toilets. SIGH.

8. “Aunties are a privilege. Now no Aunty so please do it yourself.” Said to the kids whenever they revert to suddenly not being able to do what they can do on their own and asking for help, like wearing their socks and shoes and bringing things back to the kitchen.

9. “Too bad! No Aunty!” Said as a taunt after #8 and when a tantrum is thrown for not getting help.

10. “Are you going to give me problems? Are you seriously going to give me problems now?!” This can be said in an exasperated tone, in a furious manner or in a totally resigned style when the kids start to act up or refuse to do the things as they are told.

~~~

10 things I discovered, since going maid-less:

1. If children don’t test boundaries, they won’t be children.

2. If children don’t make a mess, they won’t be children.

3. If children can learn instinctively how to clean up, sort and organise, they won’t be children.

4. That children CAN be taught to clean up, sort and organise, and they HAVE TO BE taught; and this ability comes with age and a sense of responsibility.

5. That Ben is as OCD as I am, and I can always count on him to pack in the OCD way I’ve trained him to.

6. That going on all fours to mop to the house with a cloth and a pail of water is faster than using the vacuum cleaner and then the mop.

7. That it’s OK to wash the children’s laundry together with ours.

8. That if I told the children I’m gonna be turning into a monster they would do as quickly as they are told.

9. That the children can watch Frozen or Lego Star Wars: The Movie again and again, and be completely engaged even if it’s their 18th time watching it because they are really watching it to repeat the lines after each character.

Although I don't agree with the "No right, no wrong, no rules for me - Let it go" and some other parts of the lyrics of the song, the kids love, love, love this movie. Especially Becks.

Although I don’t agree with the “No right, no wrong, no rules for me – Let it go!” and some other parts of the lyrics, the kids love, love, love this movie and the theme song. Especially Becks.

10. That even if Frozen or Lego Star Wars: The Movie is on, the littlest will still come and hug my legs and not give me a break; either that or he will be up to some mischief somewhere in the house, like wetting tissue papers at the basin, flipping his (cloth) “roti prata” up the ceiling or colouring the switches in the house with crayons. Why am I not surprised. The most he can sit through is the ‘Let It Go’ song.

~~~

10 things I am eternally grateful for…

1. Forgiving and accepting children, whom I can always count on to remind me not to yell.

2. Helpful children who will try to help out as much as they can.

There’s clean clothes to fold every single day, and on most days the kids are enthusiastic

3. The husband, who’s a solid rock for the family and me, and who would gamely whip up a three-course dinner in a stuffy kitchen complete with jazz music and a glass of red, and then help to clean up and put the kitchen back in order.

The photo on the left had 113 likes after I shared how this man would cook a meal, do everything and still smile at the camera. I would've bitten everyone's head off if they stepped into the kitchen if it were me.

The photo on the left had 113 likes on FB after I shared how this man would cook a meal, do everything and still smile for the camera. I would’ve bitten everyone’s head off if they stepped into the kitchen if it were me.

4. Kitchen appliances that help automate processes and simplify things. I officially love our bread machine, washing machine, Espresso machine, microwave and Philips Airfryer on a whole new level now.

5. This contraption from Tupperware (whoever who gave me this gift, bless your soul!) that allows me to dice my garlic and shallots in 30 seconds which I can store and keep in the fridge for later use. You know how troublesome it is with Chinese cooking, with all the garlic, shallots, ginger and all.

It’s a spinning dicer of sorts and it’s small, handy and easy to clean!

6. Supplements that give me a little extra ounce of energy and makes me feel more recharged every morning.

I used to never take any supplements but now I’m liking what I’m taking (from L to R): I’m getting sponsored to try out Forever Living’s Arctic Sea; Focus Point (by Root King) from my MIL who insists that I take these for my brain and cholesterol; Longevity from YL which lets me swallow Frankincense, Clove & Orange oil in a capsule; and a multivitamin from Nature’s Way which the husband makes me take

7. This wonderful invention called the jigsaw puzzle which keeps the kids engaged for at least 10 minutes. A few minutes of silence is always a good thing.

Thank God for jigsaws!

8. Educational resources like these which I use to keep kids occupied and improvise for our homelearning (no time to create and make new things!): flashcards, magnetic word and shape strips, counters and activity books with colouring, mazes and word search.

I buy at a sale and keep these in my stash. Very handy indeed.

And these 3 for $10 activity books are great value-for-money and lets the kids go gadget-free while waiting for their food outside

And these 3 for $10 activity books are great value-for-money and let the kids go gadget-free while waiting for their food outside

9. Community libraries all over Singapore. We can always pop in one of those in the day to escape from the sweltering heat, nestle into one of those comfy couches and read away.

Hanging out at the library

10. Young Living’s ‘Peace and Calming’ Essential Oil. This blend magically calms me down and helps me unwind. At first it smelled really strange. But then I grew to like it so much I need it to help me sleep. And I sleep very well because of it.

Also linking up with Mum in the Making‘s Thankful Tuesdays:

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Close encounters with the maid kind Family life as we know it Milestones and growing up Re: learning and child training The Kao Kids The real supermom Thunderstorm days

An unexpected trickle of happiness (nope, not because the new maid is here)

May 2, 2014

I’m bone tired and beyond exhausted, but you know what?

I’m actually very, very happy.

I’ll tell you why I’m happy. First reason.

My kids. It’s beginning to look like they are going to be well-trained.

The new helper was sent back a few days ago, and other than witnessing on the same day their mother morphing into a monster and militant ready for combat right before their eyes – complete with aggressive hollering, arms flailing and the crazy quivering; oh yes, and the often sung refrain at 140 decibels equivalent to a jet plane take-off “I AM ONLY ONE PERSON, THERE’S NO MORE AUNTY OK!”, the kids are pretty much well-adjusted to the fact that there’s only one pair of adult hands, eyes and feet in the day, at least before their father returns.

I think that seeing me react so violently under the stress of suddenly needing to handle everything alone from the moment we wake till the minute everyone hits the sack made Ben and Becks realise that things can’t be what they used to be any more.

The afternoon the helper left, we came home and I started putting things in order. I tidied up, I bathed them, I gave instructions clearly and I prepared dinner. Then we had dinner – and they had to eat every single thing I cooked with no complaints, I washed the dishes, prepped everything ready for school the next day, cleaned them up and tucked them in bed. Things didn’t go smoothly, of course. Nat stuck a Yakult straw in his ear. Someone left the tap running while I got busy. Becks left some pee on the toilet seat. Ben splashed water everywhere showering himself. They made faces at the meal I cooked. Crayons were strewn all over the living room floor. My legs were hugged while I was stir-frying. Nat begged to be nursed while kitchen fumes filled the house. Becks whined for an apple while I was chopping garlic. Nat tried to reach for knives. I could list 50 more things that happened but I don’t want to bore. Basically just three words: the kids happened.

But in the midst of the chaos, the kids happened! Ben took on his role as big brother readily and (sometimes) helped me watch and distract the mischievous littlest. They asked how they could help and by the end of the day we were all at the sink, with me doing the washing and the kids drying the plates and cutlery. All three of them, yes! They promised to help more. They offered to make less of a mess when they played or coloured or drew. They agreed to respond quickly to my commands so that I don’t have to turn into something ugly and start yelling.

By the second day, they were offering help in every way – from folding the clothes to picking up eraser dust and handing me the clothes pegs. They moved quickly when I called, got ready for school without needing help with socks and shoes. They carried their bags and heavy water bottles with no whining, and brought everything back to the sink whenever they were done with drinking and eating. We cleaned up in record time – Lego blocks were picked up and sorted, books were returned to the shelves and crayons back in the basket on the easel.

We conquered mountains (of clothes) together

When we headed out, they held hands and told me not to worry.

The car was at the mechanic and we were bus-ing to school – and this happened!

Can somebody first give me a pat on the back before applauding for these kids?

I’ll tell you the second reason why I’m happy.

The maid’s departure gave me a chance to be my totally OCD self. She came, whirled through my kitchen and made a big mess with my children’s wardrobe. Now that she’s gone, I singlehandedly sorted and organised my children’s clothes – sleepwear, underwear, home wear, going out wear, swimwear – and even managed to categorise everything according to clothes type, colour and size. I turned every single spoon, fork and chopstick in the cutlery tray in the same direction, bundled bedsheets by sets, cleaned out the fridge for expired items and hung out the laundry the way my OCD self would be happy doing. I’m a strange person to be feeling merry just rolling socks the way I want them paired and scrubbing toilets with just one toothbrush, but yes, I am merrily, merrily doing all these.

Now, this is what I’ve been dreaming about, albeit with much muscle ache and terribly wrinkled hands – a house in order at last.

Just proves one point: who’s the BEST maid for my house?

Me.

But that doesn’t mean I am not going to decide against hiring a helper. I’m bone tired and beyond exhausted, remember?

I think this absence of a domestic helper is doing the kids who have been taking many things for granted a whole lot of good. We’ve got two weeks to shape up before a new one comes and I have a feeling we’ll be doing even better by then – to the point that we’ll have a relationship with her that’s interdependent and not dependent, and that is the third reason why I’m happy.

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Close encounters with the maid kind Family life as we know it

Maid woes, Part 5

April 30, 2014

What?! I am not believing this. I’m writing a Part 5?!?!

%^!@#$%*!!@#$%&*^%$?!

So.

The new domestic helper came and was settling ok. Other than the fact communication broke down a lot due to a lack of language proficiency, I thought I caught a glimpse of this girl really trying. I mentioned in an earlier post that she couldn’t cook for her life – and even made my littlest some soup noodles that resembled gooey puke – but that, apparently, became history.

I passed her some cook books, and wa la! Like magic, she suddenly was able to cook a decent meal. Even the kids liked her cooking.

Of course, she’s got huge shoes to fill with the previous helper being way too capable – and stronger physically. She’s all bones and looked a lot paler than the previous. Ok, anyone would look pale standing next to our previous helper if you’ve seen the previous. She did also appear a little too stressed out handling a chaotic household with three kids, plus having to understand a new language and adapting to our lifestyle. I kept having to worry for her because we rushed a lot from place to place and still wanted to eat in more than out (which means meal planning is essential at the start of each day). There’s always two huge baskets of laundry to do, too many clothes to fold and sort, toilets to scrub (my son aims quite poorly and my daughter sometimes jump off before she’s done, and I’m not even going to try toilet training the littlest yet) and plenty of things to carry from groceries to bags to water bottles. She did look like she could crumble under the weight of things, literally.

Because she was like the fourth kid I had to mind, guess who ended doing the bulk of the chores?

During the second week, she began to display signs of a lack of mental resilience. And then I also found out that she constantly felt tired and was also much younger than what the papers said she was (I wonder what her intention was by coming clean). By the third week, she seemed unable to cope, and I often had to nag her about keeping well and staying physically and mentally strong to help out in a household with three kids. She started – on an on and off basis – telling me perhaps I should go look for another helper and hinted that she may be better off caring for one child or an elderly folk. I made a mental note of her hints and started asking for recommendations from friends who hired domestic helpers of another nationality.

Now, she began to really annoy me a few days ago doing the “I-want-to-work-for-you-I’m-not-sure-I-think-you-should-get-someone-better” dance. Maybe she was feeling insecure, maybe she felt she needed more compliments than criticisms, but whatever it was, I did what she suggested: look around for someone of a better fit than her.

Long story short: she found out two days ago of my decision to not keep her after a month was up, and suddenly, she had breathlessness, tiredness and pain in her heart. She claimed she wanted her misery to end and asked me to send her back immediately yesterday. And it wasn’t even a month yet! Needless to say I was furious and demanded that she be counselled by her agent. The agent cajoled her and convinced her to work her keep of a month’s salary and after the phone call ended, she apologised for her immaturity.

Despite solo parenting yesterday with three kids in tow, I was so turned off by her childishness I refused the apology and sent her back to the agency by a taxi yesterday afternoon.

No way am I keeping someone like this in my house. Good riddance anyway.

A good domestic helper in Singapore is really hard to find. I’m not sure if everything will go well with the new new helper, and if we will all be a good fit for each other. All I’m asking for is an extra pair of hardworking and honest hands to help me out while my little children still need to be minded and cared for, a peace of mind when I leave them with her when my work needs to get done and a humble attitude to learn and adapt. Not very complicated, isn’t it?

I just need an acceptable fit!

Until then, I am Mom Maid again. And I’m hoping not to ever write a Part 6 on this space, which has become a series in itself already with a Part 1, 2, 3, 4 and now this. No thanks to all these foreign domestic helper woes, I now too experience breathlessness, tiredness and pain in my heart (for the money we have to part with).

Going to have to train and ready those little troopers, I say. And get ready to play MITKH* v.2!

If you have any maid woes, I would love to commiserate with you. Share them with me in the comments below!

—

*Maidless in the Kao Household (read about version 1 here)

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The Kao Kids Thunderstorm days What to Expect... As a Mother

The day has already ended for me

April 29, 2014

Dammit.

It’s 9 am that I’m writing this and the day has already gone downhill. I am angry and exasperated. My blood’s reached boiling point and I am so ready to call it a day, curl up in bed and wake up the next morning.

So I thought I should start waking up consistently earlier a few days a week to get some work done. I’ve been following this blog and getting inspired to make some small changes in my life. I’ve been waking up with the kids (I sleep with them in their room) or sometimes later than them (if I stayed up to catch up on Running Man which I am currently addicted to) ever since Fatherkao started making the huge sacrifice of taking public transport and letting me sleep in instead of having me send him to work. I used to wake up at 6.30am to send him to work and every time I did that, the kids would also be up by 7 am bawling their eyes out. Don’t ask me why. It’s probably because they can’t find their mother and can’t go back to sleep without her. But if I slept till 9 am with them, they would usually all wake up fresh, happy and contented.

Waking up together with them has guaranteed me well-settled kids for the good part of the morning, except that now that I work from home, I’ve essentially gotten zero work done on most days. I try to stay up to do my planning and writing but I usually get so exhausted I just want to tune out, watch something on my iPad to wind down and go to sleep. It’s been a real challenge trying to find time to work while being constantly there for the kids and sometimes this becomes impossible.

Like today.

I got up at 7, saw that everyone in the room was sound asleep and crept stealthily out of bed to shower and get ready. There was editing to do, programme write-ups to think about and blog posts to plan for and I am all ready to lock myself in the study for an hour of productive work.

Then I got out of the shower and saw the little girl sprawled in front of me, awake but groggy and wanting all my attention. She whined and refused to get on with the routine for brushing teeth and having breakfast. Worse still, Nat also sensed the mom absence in the room and woke up upset and clingy. They both hung around the study, threw crayons and colour pencils (and whined some more while at that) and started squabbling. The new helper was completely helpless and totally incompetent in handling children (more on her soon in another post) and had no ability whatsoever to get the kids to listen to her.

Recipe for an explosive outburst from me there, I say.

At the breakfast table which I made everyone sit, they were making faces at the bread I bought from Crystal Jade last night and whining non stop for me. I tried two rounds of calm, patient talking and told the kids that they needed to eat and I would need to get some work done but MORE whining ensued, complete with legs kicking, chairs falling and hissy fits. Before I knew it, I morphed into my monster self, screamed at Nat and Becks for their poor behaviour and the maid for just sitting there not being able to handle the situation.

I only needed one hour. One hour to be productive. And it can’t even happen.

And then Ben woke up from all this commotion and things started happening on an even bigger scale. So after Mom’s outburst they were all suddenly cooperative and eating their breakfast and then decided that they wanted to play together. For a total of 5 minutes before the eldest started to complain about everyone else, namely his sister for eating into his space and his brother for throwing things and then more fighting ensued as they started to snatch toys and push one another. Now I have three kids fully awake, giving each other dagger stares and exasperating me to the point I want to scream in their faces and tell them all to go back to bed.

I only needed one hour. One hour to be productive. And it can’t even happen.

It’s extremely annoying that these kids can’t continue to sleep without the mother presence. It’s even more annoying that they can’t seem to share and play together peacefully and happily ever after. In days like these, I often question if I’ve gone all wrong with the way I parent them; if I made the wrong decision to have more than one kid (one kid = nobody to fight with = peace in the house); if I made the wrong move to do three kids back to back; if I had done the stupidest thing to co-sleep; if I had pursued the wrong cause of wanting to start something of my own; if they are like this because I stayed home.

I only needed one hour. One hour to be productive. And it can’t even happen.

And I’m the one all ready to bawl my eyes out now.