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Motherkao

(Self) Examination Family life as we know it Getting all sentimental now Milestones and growing up The Kao Kids

Words.

November 22, 2014

To my dearest children,

These days on some mornings, what I see sometimes breaks my heart.

Have I been too harsh? Too unkind? Are you picking up this unkindness from me?

You are all waiting for a chance to pounce on one another.

Go away! Don’t disturb me! Get out! I don’t like you! Why?! What?! I don’t like you! I don’t love you! Ugh! Shut up!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

At so young, all of you seem so agitated when things don’t go your way.

I know I have to give all of you room to resolve your conflicts and learn how to navigate your way through friction that’s experienced because you have siblings.

I know I need to give all of you room to grow and understand what one another is like. And to accept one another for who he or she is. Every one is different. How everyone relates to everyone is different. And you have to live everyday learning that the world doesn’t resolve around you, and that there are people around your age here in this family that you would have to live with for a long time.

Kao Kids eating ice cream

The moment you wake up, you’re with a brother or a sister, or two brothers for you, Becks. You’re never alone.

And you start your day everyday just learning to share, negotiate, speak up and get along. Yes, I do also know you don’t have a choice.

May I suggest something, my babies? The world is already harsh, cruel and unkind out there. Let’s speak kindness. Let’s choose to love here, at home.

Don’t be too eager to pour out on your siblings what you hear outside or from the adults in your life – we have not been good examples and always wished we could be better. We have been busy, flustered and tired to the bones.

And deep down, we wished we could always have a kind word for you.

So my dears, love one another with your words always. Because one another is all you’ve got. Play together, learn together, navigate through the course of this life together. And if there are disagreements and when things go your way, choose the way of love.

Don’t ever say you don’t love one another, ok? 

Let’s not break each other’s hearts here in this family.

Kao Kids and Me Huddle

Loving all three of you to the moon and back,

Mama

Family life as we know it Milestones and growing up Reviews The Kao Kids

This Thing About Essential Oils, Part 1: Loving every minute of being oily

November 20, 2014

So this thing about essential oils is quite something. I’ve always had problems inhaling and using store-bought essential oils and aromatherapy products. I’d feel nauseous and get headaches, so you can imagine what a wreck I would be standing in front of those aromatherapy push carts that have multiple diffusers emitting all sorts of vapours. Same goes for entering the fragrance level of departmental stores.

Until I used therapeutic grade essential oils, and the ones from Young Living.

I’m not going to enter into any discussion with anyone regarding the various criticisms and schools of thought with regard to the various companies in the States producing essential oils and their business practices and structures (they are usually MLM). I always think the person with the testimony triumphs over the one with the opinion.

Suffice to say, I trust Young Living because of the company’s ‘seed to seal’ promise and support the founder’s vision of harnessing the potential of essential oils for healing and wellness in unadulterated ways. Until that proves otherwise, of course. As a Christian, I do believe there’s a time and place for oils and medicine and treatment, but Jesus is still our Healer.

The oils are featuring quite a bit in the family and something we’ve all grown to like very much. The kids love a good sole massage with the essential oils before bed and I use Thieves rather regularly to support their immune system. I find Peace & Calming a wonderful blend too to settle overstimulated kids, especially if they are tossing and turning or waking suddenly after a bad dream.

I’ve also shared before here that I absolutely need to rub some Peace & Calming behind my earlobes when I need to calm down.

I caught a chill recently and it happened the day before my 5-km GE Run. Knowing that I should never medicate before going for a run, I oiled my soles regularly with Thieves throughout the day and applied R.C on my chest and throat.

I felt better the next day, completed my run, and never felt better.

I thought since I’ve been using Young Living Essential Oils for quite a while now, I’d share a list here of some of the oils I absolutely need to have in my household.

These are my must-haves in the house:

Photo Credit: Fellow Mom Blogger and "Oily" Friend - Serene Seah, who writes at Xavy-licious

Photo Credit: Fellow Mom Blogger and “Oily” Friend – Serene Seah, who writes at Xavy-licious

  • Purification – for insect bites and itch; to diffuse when the haze is bad. Nat was once bitten by some unknown insect after the kelong trip which formed a huge nodule and this oil applied neat for 3 days cleared the pus and swelling away.
  • Lavender – for burns and cuts, for my scalp to prevent excessive hair loss
  • Peace & Calmingneed I say more?
  • Valor – I used this to rub over sore muscles after the GE Run and I stopped aching after 2 days
  • Orange – I apply it over the liver area over the kids (3 drops directly below their right ribcage) after they eat processed food at parties
  • Citrus Fresh – for fresh-smelling rooms and children
  • Thieves – to support the immune system
  • Lemon – to add to our water, for detoxification
  • Lemongrasslove, love, love the smell when applied on my wrists (apparently that helps lower cholesterol levels) and when it’s diffused
  • Di-Gize – for stomach and digestion woes. It works amazing for the kids whenever they have unexplained stomachaches (those they say are painful and they can’t poop it out) and I use it to replace the Ru Yi Oil we used to use
  • R.C – to replace the way we apply Vicks VaporRub when we have a cold; to rub on the children’s chest and throat when they are sneezing and down with a chill
  • Oregano – for the husband to combine with Thieves to support his immune system
  • Frankincense – we pour a few drops on our palms, rub our palms together and cover them over our eyes; it does help relieve tired eyes and solve ‘floater’ problems
  • Peppermint – to get rid of terrible smells

The oils have been speeding up recovery and maintaining the well-being of the children, and we’ve been going medicine-free for a long time now. We’ve had many, many happy stories of the essential oils working well for us on occasions where the only known thing was to medicate or rush to the doctor. The kids now know that when they have a bruise, a cut, a rash, some sores, ulcers or pain in their body to say a prayer, and look for Mama to apply some oils.

I am really glad to have invested money in these oils because it’s way better than having to deal with the side-effects and after-effects of medication. We’re all now very oily, happy people!

Disclaimer: I’m not doing this MLM thing nor am I into this MLM thing, and I am not sharing this to get downlines. I get questions sometimes from readers and friends who ask me about the oils I use and what I use to to oil my kids for their wellness, and I’d thought this sharing might help.

Coming up in the next post: This Thing About Essential Oils, Part 2: All about the Zyto Scan

(Self) Examination Happy days Invites & Tryouts

I did 5 km in 50 minutes, and I’ll do it again in a heartbeat

November 10, 2014

You’ll never, ever hear me say this before 9 November 2014.

But today, post Great Eastern Women’s Run, I’ll tell you that I’ll run 5 km all over again.

The day has finally come and the moment I’ve signed myself up for has arrived. Prior to 9 November, I’ve had an awesome time being in the #RunToLiveGreat Programme as an influencer, working out once a month with non-runners like myself to prepare for the big day. For my personal training, I’ve only jogged around my estate when the weather permitted once a month as well, and that usually meant doing 1 km in 20 minutes.

S-L-O-W, I know.

You’re talking about someone who doesn’t like running. This same person would clock 32 minutes for 2.4 km in her NAPFA test in JC and fail that miserably.

But like I shared in a previous post, after much prodding and encouragement, I’ve decided to do something for my health and fitness this year.

So yesterday, in the cool of the morning (after heavy showers that fell upon our land), despite being down with a cold and a bad throat (down after three weeks of overnighters for work), I ran my first ever 5 km at the GEWR 2014.

What a lovely morning it was, yesterday

What a lovely morning it was, yesterday

And what a wonderful feeling it was, and still is.

It was a wonderful feeling to be amidst a sea of red  – amidst a sea of women wearing the red, fiery race tee. Having people around you helps to keep you motivated. Having motivated people who’s charged with adrenaline around you keeps you even more encouraged. You don’t warm up alone; you don’t run alone; you don’t wave your hands up in the air and cheer alone. You are with people. With people like you. And that makes it all together so inspiring.

It was a wonderful feeling to start the race being next to my mother. Who is 62 this year. She is an inspiration, I tell you – being 6 decades old and running the first 3 km, then brisk walking the last 2 km. She finished the race 1 minute later than me. And I am 33.

This is my mother, who is probably fitter than me

This is my mother, who is probably fitter than me

It was a wonderful feeling to experience what it’s like to accomplish something your mind sets out to do. Halfway through the race at the 2-km mark I thought I saw a quote by the kerbside that read, “Your body achieves what your mind sets out to do” and I was pumped. Before the race, I’d told myself I would start walking at the 3-km mark because I was afterall, unwell, but after reading that quote I never could convince myself to give up or start walking. I wanted so badly to focus all my energies to finish the race jogging it – all 5 kilometres of it – and finishing it well.

I proved to myself that the power of focus is powerful indeed. And if I could do this running, I could do this for anything.

That’s why I would do this again in a heartbeat.

To experience this exhilaration all over again.

My #RunToLiveGreat buddy and me - she did 21km, I did 5!

My #RunToLiveGreat buddy and me – she did 21 km, I did 5!

Becks Kao Ben Kao Going Out! Learning fun! Milestones and growing up Re: learning and child training

What my kids caught which can never be taught when it poured

November 2, 2014

One of the perks of being a blogger, at least for me these days, besides getting the usual media invites for events and product samples for review, is to be invited to exercise.

Which by the way, is great, because I so need to do so.

We were invited by the good people at SPRG (the same good folks that invited me to participate in the Great Eastern Women’s Run as an influencer) to join in the inaugural Hello Kitty Run 2014 at Sentosa as part of the feline character’s 40th birthday celebration here in Singapore. Since Becks, my little girl, is such a fan, they say.

But it’s 5km! I say. Her royal highness is not going to be able to make a 5km-run, not when her mother hasn’t even done her maiden 5 clicks yet.

It’s a FUN run, they say. And it’s perfectly ok if we walked and enjoyed the scenery.

So we said ok. Because her royal highness is such a fan, and she got excited by the thought of being in a run with me. And with Hello Kitty, or so she thinks.

And so we joined 17, 000 other fans yesterday at Sentosa, to participate in the first run of our lives together – me, Becks and Ben.

Hello Kitty’s mega 40th birthday surprise comprised a bouquet of flowers presented by Dear Daniel, a 33 inch cupcake and a birthday song sung to her by all 17,000 race participants. (Image Credit: SPRG)

Hello Kitty’s mega 40th birthday surprise comprised a bouquet of flowers
presented by Dear Daniel, a 33 inch cupcake and a birthday song sung to her
by all 17,000 race participants. (Image Credit: SPRG)

It was a madding crowd, I tell you. Local and overseas fans turned up in full force – men, women, boys, girls alike – tattooed with red ribbons and donning everything that screamed Hello Kitty from headbands and spectacles to shoes and shimmering pink skirts.

Sandwiched all the the way at the back in the huge crowd - but first, a wefie! (Look at her royal highness' grumpy face - too hot and stuffy, she says)

Sandwiched all the the way at the back in the huge crowd – but first, a wefie! (Look at her royal highness’ grumpy face – too hot and stuffy, she says)

We had to be flagged off in waves because there was such a swelling human crowd. The jostling and heat, plus the threat of a stampede, were just too much to bear.

Just look at how crazily packed it was at the starting line.

17 thousand people, folks. This is how it looked like! (Image Credit: SPRG)

17 thousand people, folks. This was how it looked like! (Image Credit: SPRG)

And then the terrible happened.

This was how the sky looked when we finally got close enough to the starting line

This was how the sky looked when we finally got close enough to the starting line

And there were still a whole lot of people in front of us!

Look at the dark clouds covering the skies. And there were still a whole lot of people in front of us!

The moment the fourth wave was flagged off (and that was us), the rain started pelting heavily on us.

It was like all the Chinese compositions we’ve ever written in school that always read “突然间下了倾盆大雨… 我们都像落汤鸡一样” came to life (loosely translated: suddenly, it rained cats and dogs and we looked bedraggled like drowned rats).

And I was torn between running back to seek shelter and hailing a cab home from Vivocity or continue walking in the rain with my five-year-old and four-year-old. So many people with young children were walking past us with their kids and babies strapped in carriers and strollers in the opposite direction anyway. Nobody would blame us for not being able to continue the race.

I was also very worried about the kids catching a cold. They have never, ever been drenched like this in their lives, and if they ever got wet because they were at water playgrounds, we always made sure that there was a warm shower facility and fresh change of clothes available. I didn’t have a brolly or poncho in my bag. I had packed light for the run – there was only a water bottle, two hand towels and two singlets to change out in my bag, plus keys and some money.

I stopped with the kids to hide under some bushes near Sentosa Gateway and asked the kids a few questions to gather information about their state so I could make a more informed decision:

Me: The rain doesn’t look like it would stop. It may get heavier and we would soon be wet to our socks, shoes and underwear. Shall we run back?

Ben and Becks: *silence*

Me: If we run back now, we can make our way home. Then we won’t be so wet.

Ben: But you said if we start a race, we finish it. That’s what people do when they race?

Me: Yep, I did say that whether we are comfortable or uncomfortable, wet or dry, we don’t give up once we start. But it’s a long way ahead. Sure you want to continue in this?

Becks: I don’t want to go home. I want to continue.

Me: Ben?

Ben: Yes, continue. We don’t give up.

Me: Alright, let’s press on to get our medals.

Ben & Becks: Continue! *with a glint in their eyes and smile on their face*

And so the decision was made. We continued to have a similar conversation in the rain at the 800m mark, the 1.6m water point and the 2.4km toilet break, and every time I would ask, “Shall we seek shelter? Can we take a break? Shall we wait till the rain becomes a lighter drizzle?” and the answer from my two determined children would still be the same.

“Let’s continue,” they would say. “Let’s not give up.”

And never did we stop once in our 5-km walk to hide from the rain or to rest our tired legs or to whine. Ben and Becks saw it as a chance of a lifetime to be indulging in free flow water play, and I saw that they were considerably cheerier as compared to the looks on their faces while we waited in the heat for the race to start.

They were happy to be skipping in the rain, wringing out water from their shirts and splashing in puddles.

Playing with raindrops at our toilet break near Palawan Beach

Playing with raindrops at our toilet break near Palawan Beach

My bag was soaked through and there would be no more dry clothes and towels, but was so glad I had a ziploc bag for my phone - hence this photo!

My bag was soaked through and there would be no more dry clothes and towels, but was so glad I had a ziploc bag for my phone – hence this photo!

The rain made being in the race uncomfortable physically for all of us but it lifted the spirits of these children.

Around the 1km slope uphill we also experienced kindness. A lady walked past us as we chanted “Never give up!” and swiftly removed the towel Ben had on his head with a beret she was wearing. Without saying a word, she waved goodbye and we were left to savour the act of kindness speechless in the rain.

What an awesome moment. Which I am sure would be remembered by Ben for a long time.

We also experienced kindness at the Sapphire Pavillion after the finish line from three lovely ladies who helped me protect my kids from the squashing and mayhem that was unfolding before our eyes as everyone pushed and shoved to collect their medals. Because it was still pouring and the only way to exchange our race bibs for our medals was in leylong style (the organisers should have thought of a more systematic way to queue, or maybe they did but everyone was in such dire need of shelter that they just kept packing the space resulting in the human jam), the kids and I were compressed by the people all around us till it got difficult to breathe. It was then we meet three friends who helped us out. Two of them formed a human cordon around my children and the last one grabbed our race bibs and edged forward to exchange for the medals on our behalf.

For that I remain forever grateful to the good Samaritans I met last morning.

Last morning, I was reminded of Philippians 3:14. We were literally pressing on towards the goal to reach for the prize.

Last morning, my children learned something that can never be taught by words nor bought by attending an enrichment class.

And we finished the race!

And we finished the race!

Last morning, they walked all 5km of a race from start to finish on their own. No strollers. No carrying. No breaks.

Last morning, they learned what it meant to never give up, and that the medal was every bit the prize they had worked hard for that they deserved.

It would have been otherwise difficult to learn this precious lesson had it not been for Hello Kitty and the rain that fell on us.

Our well-deserved medal!

Our well-deserved medal!

Disclosure: We were give media slots to participate in the Hello Kitty Run 2014. All opinions here are ours, including the lesson we learned and the exercise opportunity we gained. We endured wet clothes, shoes, socks and underwear to bring you this post. 

Going Out! Happy days Reviews The Kao Kids

Superheroes unite! – A different kind of Halloween partying

October 29, 2014

Halloween isn’t something that’s celebrated in the Kao household but it’s certainly something we cannot escape from knowing that it is celebrated everywhere else. I had hoped I wouldn’t need to explain much about Halloween to the kids but the commercialisation of this celebration seems to be getting stronger, keener and fiercer year after year.

Case in point: the FairPrice supermarket we go to week after week tells us what we should be buying and celebrating. When we see the pumpkins, ghoulish masks and pitchforks, we know for sure, that Halloween is here. Everywhere we go, we see black and orange themed decor – in the malls and in shops. The devil’s horns go for sale as headbands to be worn vaingloriously this time of the month, and these days they come illuminated and flashing too at crazy prices and worn on many a kiddo’s head.

Another case in point: I also received an invitation to attend a Halloween spa party recently which I had to politely decline because like I said, I’m not going to be partying to Halloween; I  am certainly not the type who would dress up with ketchup on my lips and chalk dust on my face to make spooky on horror night. Hurhurhur. 

But when one of my favourite places in Singapore invited the kids and me to a Halloween party, I couldn’t say no. Before you judge me as a cheapo mother who would grab any free invite, let me explain.

The Halloween party that was organised by Port of Lost Wonder in Sentosa was not the typical spooky night out that we adults associate Halloween partying to be. It was really just a massively fun costume party. And because we’re talking about Port of Lost Wonder (which my kids love!), we were happy to just turn up, wander around and get ourselves wet.

But the best part for us all was that the premise of having our presence was that a scientist’s experiment had gone really wrong and monsters have invaded it, and we’re all supposed to come as superheroes to save the day.

And because my boys are into superheroes anyway – I’m sure you’ve met Spiderman on this blog lately – and because my girl has been Queen Elsa for the longest time, the Kao kids couldn’t wait to get into some superhero action.

Practising hero moves!

Practising hero moves!

Ready to save the Port!

Ready to defend the Port!

And so to Spooky Jr. Heroes Unite we went last Saturday evening, and it was our first (and best!) Halloween party we’ve ever attended.

The Kao Superheroes met their clones...

The Kao Superheroes met their clones…

Batman also had to work hard to fly over a city and rescue a princess from a dragon

Batman also had to work hard to fly over a city and rescue a princess from a dragon

We also caught up with more teammates

We also caught up with more teammates

And gathered with more Superheroes who would be working hard to save the Port!

And gathered with more Superheroes who would be working hard to save the Port!

Then we caught up with Spiderman friend and Robot Boy friend - check out Leroy's DIY Robot Gear

Then we caught up with Spiderman friend and Robot Boy friend – check out Leroy‘s DIY Robot Gear!

So wholesome. So fun. So different. With so much memories to remember for a long time.

The kids are still talking about the party until now, I tell you. That’s how much they enjoyed being superheroes that night, and being with others like them.

And what did they have to do to save the port? Three simple things, really.

First, navigate a tricky maze...

First, navigate a tricky maze…

Next, shoot monsters with slime...

Next, shoot monsters with slime…

Slime fight!

Slime fight!

And then exterminate the remaining ones with our golden arrows!

And then exterminate the remaining ones with our golden arrows!

The rest of the time was spent going around getting pictures with everyone else in costume, eating and pigging out, licking cotton candy and getting glitter-tattooed.

Getting glitter tattooed

Getting glitter tattooed

Plus lots of bubble fun too!

Plus lots of bubble fun too!

And then change out of superhero costumes – no overtime for these kids – when their job was done to enjoy the pirate ship all on their own.

Halloween is now known as just another occasion for more wholesome fun, and we are so going to be ok with that!

More details:

Spooky Jr. – Heroes Unite! is happening again this Saturday at Port of Lost Wonder from 6.30 to 10pm. Creative costumes stand to win prizes up to $3,000 including Samsung Galaxy Tab 3 Kids, Wii, hotel stays on Sentosa at Siloso Beach Resort and Amara Sanctuary, and many more.

Spooky-Junior_Online-Banner_581x298px_FA

Save the port and win great prizes – the perfect family Halloween fun! Tickets go for SGD39.90 per kid and SGD10 for the adult.

Disclosure: We were invited to save the port. All opinions, hard work and rewards are our own. 

(Self) Examination Family life as we know it The Kao Kids

Loving, small human beings called children

October 22, 2014

Years ago back when I was in secondary school, at a personality profiling workshop, I surprised myself with my own results. While my friends and peers had a mix of different personality traits, mine came from only one dimension, with nary a hint of variety.

I don’t think you need to guess hard whether I was an all D or I or S or C.

Image captured from https://www.discprofile.com/what-is-disc/overview/

Image captured from https://www.discprofile.com/what-is-disc/overview/

Yea, I was one-track mind and one dimensional then back in school. I was a ‘D’, which means I demonstrated my emotions based on the ‘Dominance’ behaviour type. As a ‘D’, I’m task-oriented, opinionated and pushy.  As a ‘D’, my to-do list is more important than anything else in the world.

I am pretty sure I still am all that the profiling assessed me to be, even till this day.

Which makes me a really big a**hole on most days nowadays because my to-do list is almost ten miles long and my natural tendency is to put tasks before relationships and get things done at any cost, and my greatest satisfaction is to have checked something off that ten-mile long to-do list.

Which means I would ignore my kids when they come to me, whether with genuine needs or not, because I.am.so.going.to.finish.up.writing.this.curriculum.unit

AND I.so.need.to.complete.all.the.frigging.administrative.paper.work

AND I.don’t.care.what.just.handle.the.problem.on.your.own.for.crying.out.loud

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

On most days, I don’t just only ignore them. I holler at them for disturbing me. I scream at them for making me lose my train of thought. I yell at them from afar to stop fighting/whining/complaining/playing a fool/acting like monkeys. I sometimes shut myself in the room for a long time so I can work.

Someone please tell me how do I make this work-at-home-motherhood gig work?  This is more insane than I thought.

But despite me being the greatest jerk of a mom these days because we’re at the final lap of ironing out the kinks of the business (and there’s just so, so, so much to do), my children – my lovely children – are still making so much room in their hearts for this domineering, dominating, overbearing task-oriented mother.

Every day they send little drawings and notes my way to tell me how much I am loved.

From Ben to Mama

From Ben to Mama

Becks says we should all be happily playing at home

Becks says we should all be happily playing at home

Nat can't write yet but he made sure the helper held his hand to make me this

Nat can’t write yet but he made sure the helper held his hand to make me this

These are beautiful children with so much to give in their hearts.

It’s amazing how a person who’s all ‘D’ married someone who is so balanced (Fatherkao is more ‘I’ but has bits of ‘D’, ‘S’ and ‘C’) and gave birth to children who are so giving and forgiving.

I think God gave us children to teach and remind us that it is in them we find balance in life.

And God gave me these angels from heaven to tell me that I am loved, and that the way to find the balance back in my life is to love them back with all that I have.

My three lovely babies

My three lovely babies

(Self) Examination Parenting 101 The Kao Kids

Reflections of a frazzledyellingimpatientbusyhelicopter Mom

October 14, 2014

It’s been really busy on the work front, now that I’ve started working. You know the thing about being a work-from-home run-around-everywhere-when-you-need-to + full-time-mom-that-still-needs-to-ferry-everyone-around + run-a-business kind of mom is that she’s still a mom, and there are three little humans still needing her very much. The Kao kids are seeing me less – or rather, seeing me in front of the computer whenever I am home more, and I am trying every day to make the best of my time whenever I am with them.

This can sometimes go south very quickly, because depending on my mood (flustered, foul and jittery, usually) and the length of my to-do lists, I sometimes end up correcting behaviour and piling expectations, complete with hollering from needing to undo all the wrong behaviour and habits that they managed to pick up or slip back into whenever I am not around, instead of making good use of our time together to affirm, motivate and encourage.

Yes, yes. I have been helicopter mom (hovering, hovering, hovering) for sometime now, if you didn’t already know.

I know that if poor behaviour from my children manifests whenever I am not around, then the proper attitude was never learned in the first place. It takes lots of filling up love tanks and nurturing the relationship to get the kids to do right. And sometimes, hard-pressed for time as I am, I often choose the easier route – to scold, to blame, to instill fear through yelling – instead of bending down, looking at them in the eye, and correcting them as a loving mother should.

I’m not sure if it’s really because my kids are getting naughtier, wilder and more disobedient, or if it’s because I haven’t been pouring much to fill up their love tanks. If I were to do some reflective thinking here, it’s definitely the latter.

And as I am writing this post in the dead of the night while the whole house sleeps (which happens to be the time I start work on most days), I’m wishing that I did more things right today. As I wish for every night.

Like giving more hugs…

Saying kinder words…

Dishing out more patience…

Making more eye contact…

Having more self-control…

Being more present in every way possible…

And every night as I tuck my babies in bed and endure a full night of farts and kungfu fighting and water-cooler-turn-on-tap-nursing and talking in their sleep and sneezing and snoring and sleepwalking (yes, all of these happen!) while being in the same room as them, I sigh to these children and myself, and say:

Mama will be a better Mama for you tomorrow than today.

Motherhood quote

Invites & Tryouts Motherkao loves... Reviews

A cut (and colour) to stay cool – Review of SOHO by X’pect

September 15, 2014

Is it me, or is it the time of the year where the heat and humidity is getting way too unbearable?

I don’t know about your household, but we’re chalking up quite a hefty utility bill every month switching on the air-conditioning every night. And using up a whole lot of water showering at least three times a day.

So I thought I’d do my bit to cut down on the water bills by getting my locks chopped.

Long hair = more water. Short hair = less water. Right?

I was recently invited to review the hair services and treatment offered by X’pect Group.  X’pect Group is a leading group of hair salons with 16 years of experience in the industry, and 5 outlets in Singapore, with its 6th salon opening in a few months. I’ve been told they’ve won over 70 local and international awards combined, and styles MediaCorp artistes, and most recently, the Radio DJs at the Radio Awards.

Awards and accolades aside, let’s get me some haircut, I say. It’s way too hot to keep hair long in this mad weather. So I made arrangements to be away from the children one afternoon, and headed down to Square 2 for a makeover at X’pect Group’s SOHO. Mama needs a haircut, I told the Kao kids, much to Becks’ dismay. She wanted me to be in the Frozen hair braiding craze with her but I told her I was more fried than frozen in this heat.

I arrived, sat down and told Damien, my very experienced stylist that (a) the weather’s too hot, (b) I’m dropping way too much hair, (c) I’d love a look that doesn’t make my hair too flat (I have got very, very fine hair), and (d) he could do whatever he wanted.

So these were his recommendations: (a) if it’s too hot, I should get a hair cut, (b) the reason why my hair is falling off is because my scalp is too oily and I should stop using moisturising shampoo, (c) in order not to have too flat a look, I shouldn’t have my hair cut too short, and (d) if he could do whatever he wanted, he’d give me a highlight of ash green with an ash brown base to brighten my face.

Yes, to all, I say.

And so I got a cut…

Goodbye long hair, it's too hot to keep you

Goodbye long hair, it’s too hot to keep you

It's being chopped...

It’s being chopped…

...OFF!

…OFF!

Not too short though, which I am happy with

Not too short though, which I am happy with

This is just fine!

This is just fine!

A colour…

Colour_1

All the previous colouring has faded, and so now, for a new coat!

And because I complained that my scalp felt a little too itchy from the colouring, I got treated to a really wonderful pampering session – a scalp massage!

No pictures here, cos I had wanted to enjoy the massage and catch my 40 winks.

And the end product was…

Chic and cool, methinks

Chic and cool, methinks

WALA!

Side profile

Side profile

Back profile 2

Back profile

I felt light, refreshed, and cool, and walked out of SOHO with a spring in my step.

The proof of a good haircut, to me, is not the new look you have on the day itself. It’s the day after. If you woke up and saw yourself in the mirror the next day after your haircut and still like it, you’ve got a stylist for keeps.

The day after

Me and the new hair cut, the morning after

There, I am one happy person.

Thank you, SOHO by X’pect for making this happen. Now I feel cool, in every sense of the word!

With Evon who gave me the best scalp massage ever, and Damien, who envisoned and executed this style specially for me

With Evon who gave me the best scalp massage ever, and Damien, who envisoned and executed this style specially for me

I’m still able to join my little girl in her Frozen craze, alright, with this short hair. I’m singing ‘Let It Go’ with a new perspective. I’m glad I had my hair cut and am totally loving this length. Anything to stay cool this hot and humid season!

More details:

You can get a haircut at X’pect Group salons (the one I went to was SOHO at Square 2 at Novena) starting from SGD40 and highlights starting from SGD75. More information on their rates here. X’pect Group’s studios and salons are located at Orchard International Building, Sunset Way, Liang Court, Square 2 and East Coast. There’s going to be one for Westenders at Hillview opening soon too!

For more details on X’pect Group, connect with them on Facebook or check out their website here.

Disclosure: I was invited to review the service at X’pect Group and given a cut, colour and scalp treatment. No monetary compensation was received, and all opinions here are my own. 

Family life as we know it The Kao Kids The real supermom

Family life as we know it

September 11, 2014

I’ve been missing this space, and missing in action on this space for a while. So much is going on at the moment, and it’s a season of change once again.

I am going back to being a full-time working mom.

After two years of staying home and incubating ideas, I’m finally going to be giving birth to what I’ve been pregnant with for the longest time (haha, not the 4th child lah!).

I’m going to return to work that’s promising to be more fun, more fulfilling and more meaningful. Best of all, it’s something which I can call my own, and it’s something that will help the family move forward.

So we’re saying goodbye to the humdrum of old routines, and welcoming change as it comes.

That also means I will be spending considerably less time with the kids. I won’t be able to hover over them as much as I would like to (like I have done for the past 2 years, hurhurhur) and while the mom duties of chauffeuring, coaching and cuddling will still remain unchanged for as long as there’s breath in me, the kids will not be having Mama around on some days and at certain parts of the day.

But boy, am I so heartened to know that even when I am not around, my all-grown-up-babies are very much able and willing to entertain themselves – and one another. I am so glad that we did 3 kids in 4 years, now on hindsight. Because in light of this new business venture I am undertaking, it is so heartwarming and assuring to be seeing this:

Picnic Together

And this:

Kao Kids Play Together

And this:

Kao Kids and Lanterns

The Kao kids play together so well now, and three’s really a crowd. A boisterous, lively and happy crowd that’s fun, funny and so entertaining to watch. Yes, there are fights and squabbles, lots of tattling and whining still but there’s also so much laughter in the house, more than ever before, which is so, so, so reassuring for me because it means that everything we’ve been doing is worth the while.

Although I’ve been so hard-pressed in every way – to learn the ropes of running a business, to plan my time more effectively, to fill love tanks and gas tanks, to keep the household in order, to exercise and stay fit for my health’s sake – it’s amazing how everyone is adapting to this change together with me – the husband, my kids, and even the helper. We’re all learning to give and love despite ourselves. We’re all learning to celebrate every little success as we go along the way.

And I’m learning that even when you’re stretched paper thin, you have this thing called family that you can always count on to give you the support and love you need.

Family life can’t get better than this.

Fatherkao loves... Food, glorious food! Going Out! Invites & Tryouts Motherkao loves... Reviews The Kao Kids

Stealthy, steady success for a 40th birthday bash – Part 2

August 20, 2014

So the husband turned 40 earlier this August, and was given total VIP treatment by me, the kids and the good people at Crowne Plaza Changi Airport.

And because Changi Airport, particularly Terminal 3, is our family’s favouritest place in this country, it was especially special for us to be celebrating Fatherkao’s birthday there, staycating at one of the ‘World’s Top Ten Airport Hotels’.

From my stealth liaising a month before the birthday surprise to the day we checked out, my family was warmly hosted at Crowne Plaza. The Marketing Manager was fully attentive to the needs of our family of five as she arranged for us to check into the 36-square-metres Deluxe Twin Club Room with an extra rollaway bed so we could all sleep comfortably. And when she learned that the entire staycation would be a surprise birthday celebration for Fatherkao, she gamely offered to place a cake in the room so I didn’t have to run around the airport with kids in tow to hunt for one prior to checking in.

Crowne Plaza Deluxe Twin Room: Two little people are getting comfortable!

The Crowne Plaza Deluxe Twin Room: two little people are getting comfortable!

Checking out the room, and lazing on the rollaway bed

Checking out the room, and lazing on the rollaway bed

The glass panelled bathroom! And so we thought we'd be in full view of everyone when we shower, until we found blinds!

The glass panelled bathroom! And so we thought we’d be in full view of everyone when we shower, until we found the blinds!

I did nothing but turn up, check in, blow the balloons and light the candles with the kids to create some party atmosphere for the birthday boy.

This was special delivery, arranged by the Marketing Manager, who thought it'd be nice to have a cake at check in

This was special delivery, arranged by the Marketing Manager, who thought it’d be nice to have a cake at check in. The Lobby Lounge has one of the best cake selections, in my opinion. Because this cake was absolute heaven.

We were also given exclusive Club Lounge Access, and there, the kids got juice, the adults had coffee, and we all spent a lovely afternoon together after the cake-cutting, watching Fatherkao teach Ben how to play a game a chess.

Ready to lounge!

Ready to lounge!

First, some chess. Then, some juice!

First, some chess. Then, some juice!

The Club Lounge at Crowne Plaza Hotel Changi Airport was such a respite. At the lounge, we could look out and see the bustling city traffic on one side and a calming rainforest pool view on the other. The best part of it was, we had the place largely to ourselves.

City view from the Club window

City view from the Club window

Pool view from the Club window

Pool view from the Club window

We checked out the pool after we were done with our lounging, and I must say, I haven’t seen so much open space for a while in concrete jungle Singapore.

A pool with a view

A pool with a view when you look out and up

I’ve never swam in a pool like this, amidst lush greenery and wooden sun decks. It was like being in an island resort while in a city. I loved the space I could look out to, and the planes I could look up at. The kids enjoyed exploring the pool in their floats, although the water was extremely cold and being in it made our teeth chatter so much we had to head to the bathtub in the room immediately after for a warm soak.

I think the kids had the most fun being in the bathtub in full view of us looking in from the room on our beds. Give these kids warm water any time. They haven’t learned to swim yet so they’d much prefer the safety of the tub.

Before dinner we headed to the Club Lounge again, which was on the same floor as our room and the pool – and oh how so convenient to just pop by whenever we wanted – to enjoy evening cocktails, mocktails and canapés. I loved that at 5.30pm when we were there, there was absolutely no one (the hotel folks say the tourists usually head out to town and weekends are quieter than weekdays). We had the entire lounge to ourselves, and were given such royal treatment, getting served drinks of our choice, snacks and then getting our photos taken.

Oh the spread of canapes! This was like dinner for me!

Oh the spread of canapés! This was like dinner for us already!

We sneaked out while the littlest was napping to have some snacks and drinks

We sneaked out while the littlest was napping to have some snacks and drinks

I had a mocktail, he had a Singapore Sling!

I had a mocktail, he had a Singapore Sling!

Can you tell? The birthday boy was one happy camper, and was savouring every minute of his 40th birthday.

Later in the evening, we were hosted by Azur, the award-winning restaurant at Level 2 in Crowne Plaza for Fatherkao’s birthday dinner, and had some of his closest buds join us for more celebration over food, wine and laughs. At the restaurant, we talked and laughed over a good buffet spread of Eastern and Western cuisines – something which we haven’t done so with our friends for a while.

And what an even more pleasant surprise to find that there was yet another surprise for the birthday boy with yet another birthday song and cake.

Everyone's really making sure the birthday boy realises he is 40!

Everyone’s really making sure somebody realises he is 40!

Fatherkao was more than happy to be eating cake again. Not before he tried to clean off the zero in the ‘40‘ which was piped on his plate.

So he cleaned off the zero, and wished he was 4 instead

So he cleaned off the zero, and wished he was 4 instead

Still in denial, this man.

After dinner, the men continued with more wine and talk, while their wives and kids lazed in the cosy hotel room. Nothing would have pleased my husband more than this: to be able to enjoy good wine with his buddies whom he has known for decades and to cheers to more good years ahead.

The best things in life: food, friends and family

The best things in life: food, friends and family

Someone once said, “Men are like wine – some turn to vinegar but the best improve with age.” I certainly married someone that’s turning into fine wine at 40.

You’re not old, dear. You’re just mature. 

——-

Thank you, everyone that came to make Fatherkao’s day, and Crowne Plaza Hotel Changi Airport, for your hospitality and impeccable service. You’ve made this birthday really special and have set the standard for all the other staycations to come, because Fatherkao says it’s the best one he’s had so far. We’ve done A LOT of staycations since 2004, and if he says so, you’re truly something!

——–

Disclosure: Crowne Plaza Hotel Changi Airport sponsored our 2D1N staycation-and-birthday-celebration for Fatherkao, and hosted us at Azur for dinner. We had exclusive access to the Crowne Plaza Club, and had our breakfast there the next day as well. I did not receive any monetary compensation, and this post was a result of the wonderful experience we’ve had celebrating a milestone and being pampered silly. This may be the most unlikely place to consider having a staycation, but I tell you – the SPACE you get! Being away from the crowd and having such exclusivity is totally worth it, if you’re someone like me who is tired of too many malls, too many people and  too much noise.

This was our breakfast at the Club Lounge - we had the place all to ourselves on a beautiful Sunday morning

This was our breakfast at the Club Lounge – we had the place all to ourselves on a beautiful Sunday morning

Entrance to Crowne Plaza

The entrance to Crowne Plaza

More details:

Crowne Plaza is connected to Changi Airport’s Terminal 3 via a seamless, air-conditioned link bridge that gives you easy access to the shops and F&B outlets that operate round-the-clock.

A 2D1N stay in a deluxe room on a weekend starts from SGD263 and includes breakfast. The deluxe rooms feature an ergonomic workspace, comfortable beds, ensuite bathroom with separate rainshower and bathtub, and free WiFi connection.

Overnight parking is available at the airport for SGD20.