Never judge a book by its cover. And never dismiss a maid because of her skin colour.

That’s the other lesson I learned from my week-long maid woes, apart from the fact that I should heed my gut instincts when I meet someone with shifty eyes. My current domestic helper is in a hurry to go back to her country to get her ears checked. She’s called her family to meet her at the capital and given them instructions to bring enough money so she can get an MRI scan at a private hospital. Unfortunately, at the agency’s end, there aren’t any maids with ready passports. To get a new one would mean my helper, who is now unable to focus with the swelling pain in her ears and spinning head on her shoulders, would have to stay on for another four to six weeks more before her replacement comes. I didn’t want to prolong her suffering, so I asked the agency to let me know when they have suitable transfer maids coming in. They did – they sent me two sets of biodata and I chose the one with the more pleasant smile. And fairer skin.

The thing about being transferred and “returned” to the agency is that, it usually is never a good thing. You must take the time to go listen to the story behind why the maid is there. So the story for the one I sent home (yes, the one I got suckered) went like this: she worked for 13 months without any problems. But one fine day her then-employers got a call from their previous maid who worked for them for 4 years saying she wanted to return. So without any hesitation, they made arrangements to take back the old and promptly “discarded” the new. Yes, so I got the one the employer “discarded”. She came and staged a pitiful drama and was a complete disaster.

Now that she’s gone, and I am still desperately seeking a replacement, I asked about the other transfer maid whom I didn’t choose. I didn’t choose her in part because she had a big built (she looked huge in the photo) and in part because she was, well, very, very dark-skinned. Don’t judge me now. Believe you me, I’m not racist. My first concern was that I’m worried if my kids would be used to seeing someone who looked so different from us in the house. But after what happened with the shifty eyes girl,  I was desperate. I decided to interview the dark-skinned one. I was also allowed to bring her home for a four-hour orientation, to see if she was suitable for us. In those four hours, I was able to assess her attitude and aptitude to learn. I could also make sure she didn’t have shifty eyes. And I also had the chance to observe how my children took to her and if she genuinely liked children.

The conclusion after those four-hours? I kicked myself really hard. Why didn’t I choose her in the first place? She was warm, friendly, and most of all, kind. She shares the same faith as us. She listened attentively to my helper who was trying to explain things to her. Her transfer story (with lots of corroboration) was acceptable: elderly folk she was hired to take care of had to follow son to to his new post in Japan, so maid was sent back. Best of all, she was bubbly and happy, and even tried to make Becks laugh. Now, anyone who attempts to engage my daughter and tries to play with her, in my opinion, is worth her salt. So I said yes to her and told the agent to proceed with the paperwork. And I also told myself to never ever dismiss someone because of her skin colour.

Shame on you, motherkao, for judging a person by the colour of her skin. Let’s hope things will work out for us now.