Family life as we know it Archives - Page 8 of 8

Family life as we know it The Kao Kids Thunderstorm days

My week in numbers

June 15, 2012

40: the reading on the thermometer in degree Celsius on Monday night when Ben had a viral fever

10: number of times Becks woke up this week to ask for milk in the middle of the night (twice nightly for the past five days)

5: average number of times my son coughs into my face a day

3: average number of times Ben and Becks fight over nothing in a day

2 and 387: number of days before Nat starts infantcare and number of times my heart ached this week at the thought of it

I didn’t have a great week and I’m dreading the next. Come Monday, this mother will be crying buckets as she sends her littlest to a place where Mama is no longer his world and his everything. He will meet new caregivers and have to learn how to drink from the bottle, somehow. A good deal of crying and starving might follow.

My heart is aching so bad now. My baby will be searching for Mama and I won’t be there!

Excuse me while I go and dry my tears.

5 Comments

Family life as we know it I ♥ lists Milestones and growing up Nat Kao The Kao Kids

Enter Lil’ Nat

May 19, 2012

It’s now triple the madness. Ever since little Nat entered our world, the Kao household is never really quite the same again. Here’s what has changed:

1. We’ve all gotten used to Nat’s crying as part of ambient sound. Because this is our third baby, we don’t pick him up as and when he calls. Although I sometimes indulge him a little; this being the last time (hopefully!) I’ll be holding a baby (that’s mine) this small.

2. Peak hours have extended. It used to be crazy from 6 to 8.30pm, but now it’s even crazier, with peak period officially ending at 10. This is because everything gets delayed with Nat in the picture (see #3).

3. My kids have become more clingy than ever. When I was pregnant with Nat, Ben and Becks were pretty ok with feeding themselves and having someone else shower them. But now, it’s “Mama, feed me“, “Mama, change my diapers“, “Mama bathe me“, “Mama clean my mouth“, basically, “Mama, [DO EVERYTHING]“. They would burst into fits and throw ginormous tantrums if fatherkao or the helper were to come along and do what they want me to do. Becks would refuse to eat if I didn’t hold the spoon. Ben would hold on to my thighs. They would both sit on the floor and cry because they want Mama. This is the reason for the extension of peak hours – the three kids would take turns to be fed / cleaned / showered by me, which means that by the time all is settled, Mama is an exhausted wreck. All these would happen on a daily basis while the helper and fatherkao watch helplessly at a corner.

4. My kids have learned how to be considerate and helpful overnight. The clingy part aside, they have turned into helpful little troopers, refilling wet wipes and entertaining Nat when I need a break. They’ve also learned to shush each other up and whisper. This never happened when there were only the two of them.

5. My husband and I have started asking each other for permission to go to the toilet. Usually, when permission is granted, we’ll also furnish each other with details of why we are going and how long we would take.

6. Our house is filled with a lot more laughter amidst the madness. Yes, we are all stretched thin but when we see the two clowning around the little one, and the little one chuckling repeatedly, we can’t wait for the day when all three of them would start playing together. What fun!

4 Comments

Family life as we know it I can't categorise such entries What to Expect... As a Mother

Exodus

May 7, 2012

It’s been an awful day.

First, I woke up at three in the morning because Ben started gagging, coughing and wheezing. Then I woke up again later in the morning to find a nasty virus attacking my throat.

Thanks to the thunderstorm last night, it’s one of those days I wished I could sleep in because the weather was finally *nice and cool* but no, I had to resist the beckoning of the bed because the boy needed the doctor.

To top it off, the neighbors one floor below decided that today shall be the day they will hack all their kitchen and bathroom tiles. Yippee!

So what do you get when a sick child, a zonked-out mother, a father looking forward to enjoying his day off (imagine his disappointment!), another constipated child and a two-month-old infant find themselves in an apartment where they can’t hear one another because the hacking, knocking and drilling downstairs is at least two (bloody) hundred decibels?

Plenty of shouting in the house and a nerve-wrecking helluva morning.

The poor kids were so snappy and cranky and stoned by nap time. But it was still bam bam! bam! bam! bam! – pause (for five minutes) – zvrooooooooooooooom! zvroooooooooooooom! zvroooooooooooooooom! (for the next twenty) – bam! bam! bam! bam! bam! zvrooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooom (multiply by infinity).

They drifted off to sleep only to be startled again with the drilling and hacking; and this dozing and waking happened for forever, until we decided we would not lose our sanity this way and that it was too cruel to subject an infant to this that we lugged three crying babies out of the house and headed somewhere where we could find peace. quiet. rest.

We found our haven at IKEA. We never found more comfort in a place that’s not our home and today’s the day. We didn’t even do the pretend-we-are-shopping-for-furniture thing; we just plonked ourselves on the next available bed/ sofa/ couch at IKEA the moment we got there. Talk about respite.

We could have gone to Courts next door too, if not for the super long nap we all took in one of those 55 square meter living space in IKEA. I’m sure the Simmons bed at Courts would be worth-a-plonking.

Note to self: maybe next time when another neighbor decides to renovate.

0 Comments

(Self) Examination Family life as we know it Mommy guilt Thunderstorm days

Mega Meltdown

April 26, 2012

I had a meltdown of epic proportions last night. It was the culmination of a series of rather unfortunate events. I say rather because on hindsight, for one, I survived it (hey, I woke up this morning and didn’t feel that depressed), and besides, the Baudelaire kids have it worse.

The morning started with a cough from Ben and him doing a Merlion continuously for a few minutes, complete with Becks yelling “Kor kor pass urine! Kor kor pass urine!” and trying to jump on the spot where he merlion–ed. This was when everything happened in slo-mo for me. I walked out to smell a stench of undisgested goat’s milk all over the corridor. Amidst the stench, I lifted Ben to the other bathroom to shower him while having to answer his questions groggily (Am I going to school? Why are you washing me, Mama? Is Becks going to school? Am I sick? Do I need to see a doctor? Can I eat medicine?) and thinking ahead of myself what this day would bring. We decided to keep Ben home (I think it’s probably a mild case of stomach flu) and so I told Ben to play on his own.

Not knowing how to deal with boredom or being alone, Ben proceeded to help the housemaid with her daily vacuuming and dusting chores. They were happily in it together until she told him that she was gonna start vacuuming the shoe cabinet area and he was like, ok, it stinks so I’m sitting here to watch’ya, Auntie! And lo and behold, just as I was coming out to take the breastpump parts from the steriliser I saw her using the vacuum brush to dust *gasp* the sole of every shoe! Mortified by her absolute lack of common sense of the not-so-intelligent-Burmese-kind (sorry, I don’t mean to be mean here, but seriously, vacuuming the soles of shoes?), I let go a series of expletives (not at her, via whatsapp, to fatherkao) and told her that was a terrible thing to do:

Me: Shoes step… toilet, lift, shopping centre, car, pavement… DIRTY! Dead ants, mud, dirt, saliva, urine, germs – all on soles of shoes!!!!

Maid: Yes, ma’am.

Me: Vacuum brush… clean bed, cot, toys, chairs, tables, tv top, everything. Children touch, put fingers in mouth, rub eyes, nose…Fall sick!!!!

Maid: Yes, ma’am.

I’ll leave it to another post to rant about why I needed to get a maid and why a maid of the Burmese origin. Suffice to say, she was scared shitless by my outburst and I was left wallowing in guilt for being so unkind to another human being in front of my very stunned son, who probably thought vacuuming soles was the coolest thing to watch if not for his mother shrieking her lungs out.

Then my mother-in-law came because she was such a kind soul to take my maid to the polyclinic because she had been complaining of a earache for almost two months now. I am convinced more than ever that she might end up being the fourth kid I have to take care of because of her absolute lack of common sense, but like I said, it will be for another post another time. So she left with my MIL and I was alone with a three-year-old toddler and a two-month-old infant, which was fine by me because Becks wasn’t in the equation, and if she was, then it would definitely NOT be fine (are you kidding me, one pair of eyeballs to two tods and an infant?). Ben was a darling (I don’t think it was stomach flu) and played on his own as long as I sat beside him. Occasionally he would ask for biscuits and help with flushing the toiletbowl, but it was lovely to have some time to spend with him. Until I discovered that there was laundry in the washing machine, toilet rugs unwashed (the boy had also vomitted in the toilet in the morning!), a very unsterile washing machine that has loose threads and grime, and kitchen cloths and floormats stuffed in the children’s laundry basket of clean clothes. I nearly went ballistic. Add to the madness of putting right what the maid didn’t – three knocks on the door by the postman (at different times) because I have been happily g-marketing away last week, a hungry infant and a toddler in need of lunch and a nap, plus the realisation that I need to fix lunch for Ben, that pretty much sums up the madness in the afternoon.

The maid came back with a referral letter to see an ENT specialist and I had to beg my MIL to take her to the hospital next month. Then my daughter came back from daycare looking like grumps and throwing tantrum after tantrum, wanting my attention, all 58 kilos of me to sit right next to her. Both tods wanted Mama to feed them their dinner so there I was practising my octopus-juggling act while stealing occasional glances at the baby telling him soon it would be his turn to feed.

Then I came up with a brilliant idea of letting fatherkao do a bottle feed so I can feed the kids and grill the red wine-marinated ribeye in my happycall pan and have a nice romantic dinner complete with rucola salad and Cabernet Sauvignon (ambitious, I know). Except that I forgot to factor in baby Nat refusing the bottle (he gags) and fatherkao needing to move his bowels and take a shower after a hard day’s work.

So you have it, the perfect conditions for a meltdown: two whiny kids, a screaming infant, a tired hubs and a my-rubber-band-is-going-to-stretch-and-break mom. And it took one MISunderstanding amidst the 100-decibel noise pollution (called a crying symphony by two tods and an infant) to lead to a screamfest between fatherkao and me, resulting in a meltdown of swearing, sobbing, sulking, et al.

By the end of the day, I felt so bad for screaming/sulking/sobbing that I cried so hard singing lullabies to my babies. They must be wondering why Moses crossing the Red Sea and Jesus Loves Me makes Mama feel so sad. By the time they were asleep, I was a hungry, exhausted wretch. I thought I’d get some junk food to make me feel better so I ordered McDelivery and chomped down a mcchick, nuggets and a pack of fries. I didn’t feel better; I felt bloated which led to more guilt pangs of adding to the kilos which are already so hard to lose from pregnancy. And as I tried to sleep away all the bloatedness and guilt, I started to have a earache too. It was certainly not from the earlier noise pollution. It was a real earache which was so painful it kept me awake all night. It was like the terrible-ness to end a terrible day. I hope earaches are not contagious. If they were, it must be because the maid has been vacuuming the soles of our shoes.

2 Comments

Becks Kao Ben Kao Family life as we know it Invites & Tryouts Milestones and growing up The Kao Kids

Don’t worry Mama, we still love each other

April 26, 2012

My kids have started to fight. I don’t know when it started but I guess it’s inevitable because feisty-with-fearsome-temper Becks is growing up. But after all that snitching and snatching (we never really interfered till we see blood because, well, sibling rivalry, it’s part and parcel of life), they always kissed and made up and told each other they were sorry and still love each other.

Still, I’m missing this – what they used to do when they were a little younger: