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Kao Kids

Invites & Tryouts Milestones and growing up Parenting 101 Product Reviews Reviews The Kao Kids

Oral freshness, thanks to Aquafresh (and Helicopter Mom, of course)

April 2, 2015

As a hands-on and unashamed helicopter mom, I micromanage 30 fingernails, 30 toenails and 3 sets of 20 baby teeth.

This is a job I am proud of. I never outsource the cleaning and maintenance of these body parts of my children (well, almost never) and I wouldn’t even let the Kao kids independently handle them, especially when it came to teeth.

Here’s the reason why.

Children begin teething around six months of age. Most people know these teeth as baby teeth. By the time they are 3, children have 20 baby teeth – 10 on the top and 10 on the bottom. These teeth are destined to fall out, and would some day mark the beginning of yet another milestone of growing up. And my job, as I have taken it upon myself as my children’s mother – like a mission of some sort – is to make sure that this destiny arrives to greet them as late as possible. In other words, no tooth fairy visits before 6 years old at least.

Here’s how I do it.

1. Impose a candy quota

I used to terrorise my children with horror stories of how every candy they put in their mouth can hide well around their teeth, and then plaque comes and have a heyday. Now that they are older, the stories don’t seem to work so well anymore. Or rather, the temptation of a lolly outweighs the fear of plaque attack. But because they have been rather well-trained to always ask Mom for permission, I still get some control over how much sweet stuff they ingest. My general rule-of-thumb: vitamin gummies in the morning after breakfast, something sweet if the day is going to get them outdoors and active, and none at all if we’re cooped up at home. Sugar high, no thanks.

2. Load up on the calcium

When I was younger and when I felt that my adult teeth felt a little off (like when something was strangely shaky or unsettled), I would go eat lots of cheese.  Surprisingly, that worked for me. When I became a mom, I made sure cheeses, yogurt and milk feature a lot in the kids’ diet. They love their cheeses, they love their dairies. Thank God.

3. Use age-appropriate toothpaste

Not every toothpaste is created equal; some more equal than others. I used to be quite alarmed at how disparate the prices of toothpaste can get. One tube could cost $2.50 while another in a similar size but different brand could cost $15. And then I found out that it’s all in the ingredients.

After being a micromanager of teeth for the past few years and reading up on the relevant literature and research that’s got to do with children’s teeth, this is what I follow:

0-2 NO flouride, thank you very much. The kids, when they were infants, had their teeth cleaned with tooth wipes. When they started standing at the sink at age one-half, the toothpaste had to be safe to swallow.

2-4 Flouride ok, but kid must be able to spit. Spitting is a skill to master and they had better master it first. Toothpaste must also be very gentle to teeth.

5 onwards Gentle toothpaste with flouride but if there’s more foaming action, it would be better as that helps to keep their breath fresh.

4. Change their toothbrushes regularly

This is something I make sure happens every 3-4 months. I check for frayed bristles and make sure that the toothbrush shape, size and bristles are age-appropriate. Cartoon characters are optional, but I try to get them something that gets them excited about brushing. Which means the toothbrush had to move with what was hot favourite of the day: Spiderman, Barbie, Disney Cars…

5. Let them brush all they want, and then I do it again (and sometimes my helper)

While I do teach my children how to brush their teeth and allow them to do it on their own, there’s never such a thing in the house as you brush, you go. It’s always, you brush, you stay there and wait for Mama or Aunty to come brush for you AGAIN.  Because have you seen my kids brush their teeth? It’s like done in two seconds most of the time.

***

Recently, the Kao kids got really excited about brushing and started doing it close to four times a day, after every meal.

The morning and night brush is supervised still (as I have always insisted), but something is motivating them to brush their teeth without any adult nagging or resistance.

Enter Aquafresh.

Aquafresh_Kao Kids_02

The “toothpaste with 3 stripes” has finally launched a brand new Aquafresh Kids range, catering to the oral care needs of children of different age groups  Thanks to the good folks at Aquafresh, the Kao kids received a new set of toothbrush and age-appropriate toothpaste, and quickly got to work testing them out.

I’m sure you can see their enthusiasm just by looking at those toothy grins.

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Reviewer: Nat
Using: Aquafresh First Teeth baby toothpaste (3 – 24 mths) + Milk Teeth toothbrush (0-2 years)

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We’ve always been using this when the kids were babies, and I see now it has a new packaging. I hear this toothpaste has been out of stock globally a while back and is now finally back on shelves. It’s still apple-banana flavour and my cheeky son tells me it’s really nice jelly to swallow.

First Teeth Baby Toothpaste old packaging (Credit: Aquafresh)

First Teeth Baby Toothpaste old packaging (Credit: Aquafresh)

Aquafresh First Teeth baby toothpaste and Milk Teeth toothbrush are specially designed by dental experts to gently care for precious first teeth – just for 0 years to 2 years children. The First Teeth baby toothpaste is a toothpaste designed by dental experts to gently care for precious baby teeth and so help permanent teeth come through healthy and strong, and provides gentle cleaning with no abrasives, artificial colours or flavours. It is also fluoride-free so it is safe to swallow.

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Nat liked it for old times’ sake – I’m sure he remembers this toothpaste which he’s been using, but he is now three and after a few days of using First Teeth, he requested for something minty, like big boys should.

And can I say I absolutely love the shape of the Milk Teeth toothbrush? I know he’s 3 already and I need to graduate him soon but it is oh-so-easy to maneuver in the insides of his mouth with this.

Reviewer: Becks
Using: Aquafresh Little Teeth products (3 – 5 years)

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This girl is complaining her tooth is a little shaky – which is totally making me panic (she’s not 5 yet!) – and so I am making her take her toothbrushing very seriously. I have ordered that she be off the bottle (she loves her Milo in her bottle!) and let’s hope Aquafresh can help repair some damage. Apparently, by this age, the enamel which is now thinner makes her teeth more vulnerable to decay. And if they aren’t cared for, permanent teeth may not come through healthy and strong.

Aquafresh Little Teeth products are specially designed by dental experts to encourage healthy brushing habits and protect precious first teeth – just for kids 3 years to 5 years. Aquafresh Little Teeth toothpaste is a gentle cleaning fluoride toothpaste with sugar acid protection to care for those precious first teeth and helps permanent teeth come through steadily.

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She says, I like my toothbrush, it’s nice to hold and turn. My toothpaste is a little bit spicy but I can handle. 

I say, it would be nice to have some fruity flavours. Not many kids this age can take mint exploding in their mouths!

Reviewer: Ben
Using: Aquafresh My Big Teeth products (6+ years)

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He’s just turned 6 and is entering into big boy zone now with primary one looming ahead and two shaky teeth, one on top and another at the bottom. Our dentist commented during our recent visit that he has really well maintained teeth, which made me beam like a proud mother while he sat on the dentist chair. I was so going to whisper that that’s the benefit he reaps from his mother micromanaging every friggin’ details of his teeth and oral hygiene since the day he had teeth, but decided to let him take the glory. After all, he always does one good first round of brushing before the adult comes to do the second.

Aquafresh My Big Teeth products are specially designed by dental experts to protect mixed adult and baby teeth. Mixed adult and first teeth also create awkward gaps which are hard to clean, creating “plaque traps.”  The child’s new adult teeth may look big and strong but the enamel on new teeth is more vulnerable to decay for several years. Aquafresh’s My Big Teeth is a toothpaste with foaming action (and sugar acid protection!) to help it get around the mouth whilst actively targeting softer enamel to keep it strong.

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And it is this “yummy, minty, clean-feeling” in the words of my eldest that makes him want to use keep using his toothpaste. This boy has been finding many excuses to brush food bits away since he got acquainted with Aquafresh’s My Big Teeth toothpaste. Never seen a more enthusiastic boy when it comes to oral hygiene.

With these children’s enthusiasm in brushing and keeping teeth clean, a host of value-for-money, specially designed oral products, and a micromanager-mom, these 3 sets of teeth should remain cavity-free for a long, long time.

Smile!

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And if you’d like to have a reason to smile too, hashtag #AquafreshKidsSG with a video or photo of your child brushing his/her teeth with any Aquafresh Kids products on your personal Facebook or Instagram page. 10 selected winners with the most number of LIKES (across Facebook or Instagram) will win a one year supply of Aquafresh Kids products. Contest runs from 1 March to 30 April 2015 (Terms & Conditions apply).

Final

If you have trouble getting your kids excited about toothbrushing, get your kids to check out this app by Aquafresh called Brush Time. The Aquafresh Nurdle shows kids how to brush their teeth using catchy tunes and fun-loving animations, plus rewards.

All Aquafresh products are available at leading supermarkets and pharmacy outlets. The App can be downloaded free from iTunes.

Disclosure: This is a sponsored post which means that the products we received are sponsored, and my little reviewers will actually be making some money bringing you this. As our practice, we have reviewed the products in a manner as honestly as possible. All opinions here are our own.

P/S: I know the kids may have gone a little overboard with the excessive 4 times a day brushing, but they take their reviewing job very seriously. 

Going Out! Invites & Tryouts Learning fun! The Kao Kids

A date with Mama’s old friend

April 1, 2015

If you grew up in Singapore, you would have met Singa the Courtesy Lion.

In fact, I’m going to show off here on my own blog to say that I was once chosen to wear the ‘kindness badge’ that’s got Singa on it in Primary 2. Or was it Primary 3? Gosh, that was way too long ago. Back then, he was the mascot of the Courtesy Campaign. And the badge was the coveted honour we wanted to wear on our school uniforms because that’s to tell the world you’re a very, very courteous pupil.

It’s no longer called the Courtesy Campaign now but the ‘Singapore Kindness Movement’ today. Back in the good ol’ days in 1996, during his New Year Message, then Prime Minister Goh Chok Tong highlighted the need for Singapore to become a gracious society by the 21st century. Considerate social behaviour supported by a strong economy and good government will make Singapore the best home for its people, he said. In line with Mr Goh’s call to build a gracious society, the Singapore Kindness Movement (SKM) was formed in 1997 and aims to encourage Singaporeans to make a positive commitment to gracious living through simple acts of kindness in their daily activities.

I’m all for teaching kindness and graciousness to my children, and it’s my personal parenting belief that with or without this movement, my kids must learn their manners and to be gracious from the heart.

But Singa! Singa is someone they absolutely must meet! So despite not needing to join a movement to learn about kindness, I had to lug everyone to see him when he came to a mall near us with his ‘Kindness Cubbies’.

It was nice to get up close and personal with an old friend. Yes, he was introduced as “Mama’s primary school friend” to the Kao kids.

Singa

Singa & the Kindness Cubbies

Singa & the Kindness Cubbies_and us

My children’s take-away from this meet-and-greet and mall show? I’m so glad it wasn’t “Singa is so cute right!” or “Omigosh, the girl-cubbie’s so adorable” but the 5 MAGIC WORDS to make Kindsville a pleasant place to live in.

What are the 5 MAGIC WORDS? Bring your kids to check Singa and the Kindness Cubbies out!

Venue: Northpoint Shopping Centre

Date & Time:

  • 17th April (Friday) – 7:30PM
  • 18th April (Saturday) – 2:30PM & 7:00PM
  • 19th April (Sunday) – 2:30PM & 7:00PM

Venue: Downtown East

Date & Time:

  • 1st May (Friday) – 7:30PM
  • 2nd May (Saturday) – 2:30PM & 7:00PM
  • 3rd May (Sunday) – 2:30PM & 7:00PM
At the roadshow, you can even send 'Love Letters' for free to family members and friends, courtesy of the very kind SingPost!

At the roadshow, you can even send ‘Love Letters’ for free to family members and friends, courtesy of the very kind SingPost!

Disclosure: I’m a supporter of any local movement or initiative that makes our home a better place. Here’s to spread a little kindness! We were invited to pose with Singa and Cubbies. No monetary compensation was received. All opinions here are our own.

Going Out! Invites & Tryouts Learning fun! The Kao Kids

Starting the holidays on a Voyage of Big Ideas

March 15, 2015

Tis’ the first day of the March holidays today, and we were up and about, dreaming, exploring and embarking on new adventures.

At Imaginarium, that is.

Imaginarium: A Voyage of Big Ideas, the exhibition is inspired by the crescent moon on the Singapore flag, symbolising a young nation on the rise and its capacity to dream big and think large

Imaginarium: A Voyage of Big Ideas, a children’s exhibition inspired by the crescent moon on the Singapore flag, symbolising a young nation on the rise and its capacity to dream big and think large.

Imaginarium: A Voyage of Big Ideas, is the new edition of the Singapore Art Museum at 8Q‘s much loved annual contemporary art exhibition for children. Now in its fifth year running, this exhibition features immersive artworks by emerging and established artists from Singapore and around the region and interactive hands-on activities for “everyone and anyone with a head for ideas and a heart for adventure”. It’s also the first in a series of SAM exhibitions that celebrate Singapore’s Jubilee Year.

We were invited by SAM@8Q and CRIB Society, Singapore’s first social enterprise that aims to empower women entrepreneurs through networking, matchmaking and incubation, of which I am also a member of, for the media preview of Imaginarium.

The exhibition, specially dedicated to children and curated for them to learn and play, is truly one that reflects a learning-through-play philosophy and appeals to a child’s senses and sense of exploration.

The Kao kids got to wander – and wonder – a lot today. At SAM, they gamely put on their sense of keenness and exploration and their most appropriate behaviour (after many rounds of “briefing” before we came, also known as follow instructions! remember a museum is not a playground! make sure everyone gets to enjoy so no yelling and hoarding! be mindful of others around you! and other momspeak), we checked out every gallery at Imaginarium, which spans four levels.

The start of our wandering and wondering at SAM at 8Q: today we have DinoBoy from DinoMama Blog for company!

The start of our wandering and wondering at SAM at 8Q: today we had DinoBoy from DinoMama Blog for company!

Here at Imaginairum, they built their own estates and communities with these tetris-shaped blocks in this colourfully illustrated room…

Drawing inspiration from urban planning, Singapore artist Chiang Yu Xiang’s We Built this Estate! is an interactive installation that invites everyone to create their own housing estates and city skyline with Tetris-shaped housing blocks.

Drawing inspiration from urban planning, Singapore artist Chiang Yu Xiang’s We Built this Estate! invites everyone to create their own housing estates and city skyline with Tetris-shaped housing blocks.

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We built this city!

We built this city!

We built this city of tetris shapes!

We built this city!

We built this city!

We built this city of tetris shapes!

We built this city of tetris shapes!

Dropped their jaws in fascination, looking at these fantastical versions of the Singapore story and doodles…

Imagine-a-doodle by Singapore collective Band of Doodlers: illustrations sprawled across the walls and winding their way up the four levels of SAM at 8Q

Imagine-a-doodle by Singapore collective Band of Doodlers: illustrations sprawled across the walls and winding their way up all four floors of SAM at 8Q!

Made music when an adult (yes, their Mama – who else?) cycled on a stationary bicycle…

Here I am, cycling in a dark room, with the boys waiting for energy to transferred so they can start making music.

Here I am, cycling in a dark room, with the boys waiting for energy to be transferred so they can start making music. This is the artwork of Canadian-born, Singapore-based artist Vincent Twardzik’s Green II: Interstellar Overdrive. This artwork installation only comes alive when visitors cycle on stationary bicycles which are hooked up to various objects.

Created a dream world of planting sweets…

Planting rice is never fun. But planting sweets is.

Planting rice is never fun. But planting sweets is.

Nat is lost. In a sea of candy trees.

Nat is lost. In a sea of candy trees.

Someone has a sweet tooth, this is for sure.

Someone has a sweet tooth, that is for sure.

"I wish this was a real Chupa Chups," he said.

“I wish this was a real Chupa Chups,” he said.  This installation is the Dream House by South Korean artist Jeeyoung Lee. And we all know why.

Discovered magical secret worlds…

Entering into a world of magical colours...

Entering Kiko’s Secrets by Sri Lankan-born, Vietnam-based artist Kumkum Fernando. First, the world of magical colours…

And another of bugs...

And another of bugs…

Really weird bugs!

Really weird bugs!

Look, Mama! Look what I found!

Look, Mama! Look what I found!

EGGS!!!

EGGS!!!

And got a good whole hour of hands-on fun adding to a collective tapestry featuring yarn, and weaving, covering spaces and making pom-poms…

Singaporean artist Izziyana Suhaimi’s work Let’s Make! Studio explores new worlds through embroidery. In a designed workspace in the gallery, visitors are invited to make their own small objects which capture their thoughts about Singapore’s future

Singaporean artist Izziyana Suhaimi’s work Let’s Make! Studio explores new worlds through embroidery. In a designed workspace in the gallery, visitors are invited to make their own small objects which capture their thoughts about Singapore’s future.

And so the kids begin... to make something bigger than their lives

And so the kids begin… to make something bigger than their lives

Twirling yarn around nails...

Twirling yarn around nails…

Mixing colours and finding patterns...

Mixing colours and finding patterns…

And while Ben weaved some more...

And while Ben weaved some more…

Becks and Nat chilled at the reading corner, flipping story books

Becks and Nat chilled at the reading corner, flipping story books

And then of course, someone doesn't really read. He goes to make green pom-poms instead.

And then of course, someone doesn’t really read so he goes to make green pom-poms instead.

Hot favourites of the day were yarn, yarn and more yarn, and tetris-shaped blocks.

The next time round, I hope to get them to appreciate more of the details found in these art installations and contemplate on a deeper level what they are interacting with.

There’s just so much to learn and teach through art, and I am glad we had the opportunity to do that today. The kids have been experiencing more of my absence this year, and we finally got some time together today, which would not have been possible on most Saturdays. I think this is the first time this year we are spending so many hours together being meaningfully engaged in something, and I’m glad we did it with Imaginarium.

Tis’ a great start to the March hols!

Candy floss, anyone?

Candy floss, anyone?

***

Imaginarium: A Big Voyage of Ideas beckons the adventurers, the dreamers, and the explorers of today to embark on a journey of discovery, and together, sail towards exciting new horizons. From 14 March to 19 July 2015 at the Singapore Art Museum at 8Q. Free admission for Singapore citizens and Permanent Residents.

Disclosure: We were invited to preview Imaginarium by CRIB Society. No monetary compensation was received, and all opinions here are my own.

Milestones and growing up Nat Kao What to Expect... As a Mother

Terrible Twos, delayed

March 8, 2015

It’s finally here.

I had thought this was a child who would breeze through toddlerhood with a wonderfully perfect disposition and personality. He was cute, endearing, charming and affectionate at one and for a good part of the second year. He ate when it was time to, slept when it was time to, and although there was the occasional tug-of-war when it came to the battling of wills, it was usually easy to distract him and win each battle.

Until now.

Nat, my littlest, has got his Terrible Twos way, way delayed. And man, am I so exhausted now having to deal with the hugest streak of stubbornness yet. Cos’ even Ben and Becks weren’t like that.

Think sitting on ground (any ground – wet, muddy, flat, hilly) kicking his slippers off his feet and throwing the hissiest of fits. Think grabbing onto your leg and not letting you budge an inch when you refuse to do what he wants. Think shouting into your face and pinching you with all the might his little fingers can muster until he gets his way. And throwing things out and away when he doesn’t want them, screaming the moment you start scolding him and creating a scene everywhere  – at home, at  restaurants, inside the wet market, on the escalators of shopping malls, in the carpark – when he is that mood.

Yep, that’s what we’re looking at now. A three-year-old who’s testing every boundary, challenging authority and showing us what he’s made of.

Someone's throwing a tantrum here because he wants to go swimming but it's time to go to school

Someone’s throwing a tantrum here because he wants to go swimming but it’s time to go to school

I do now know. Nat’s personality, that is. Much is revealed when every child goes through this stage – what kind of a person he is when he’s tired, stressed, hungry, bullied, which is a pretty accurate gauge of the personality he would possess when he’s older.

He’s one helluva feisty, persistent and obstinate boy, I tell you.

Every day he needs to be with his scooter. And we have to lug it everywhere for him, or risk a meltdown

Every day he needs to be with his scooter. And we have to lug it everywhere for him, or risk a meltdown

But even so, there are moments of tenderness. He is quick to apologise and move on, and clever enough to use his charm to sweetly ask for things and plead with you. He’s extremely intelligent and would use all that wit to say something silly to make you laugh in your anger. And he would cry the piteous of cries, complete with those tears flowing freely.

Charming pose #14567

Charming pose #14567

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Showing you the contents of his mouth so he can laugh when you feel grossed out!

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Giving his cheeriest grin because he is eating his favourite… EGG!

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And another charming smile with those huge eyes

Ah, Nat…

This boy’s just turned three and it looks like I am not seeing the end of the tunnel yet. So I’m going to be brainwashing myself with the “this too shall pass” chant a great deal to soldier on in this delayed phase of the Terribles.

***

And this post is going to end with this photo, which pretty much sums up my life right now, with him.

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At the count of three, he decided to grab my hair! Oh well, gong xi fa cai!

Ben Kao Getting all sentimental now Happy days Milestones and growing up The Kao Kids

6.

February 26, 2015

My firstborn occupies a special place in my heart.

He is creative, spontaneous, imaginative and curious.

He is sensible, kind-hearted, and always eager to learn and help.

For the longest time ever, I have yet to handle a meltdown or a tantrum from him. He understands and listens to reason, and always chooses to love and obey. He is affectionate all the time and hardly has a mean word for anyone.

Yet these are not the reasons why I love him so.

This boy was my very first. The very first baby I carried in my womb for 38 weeks. The very first human being I held in my arms to say, “Hello, I’m your Mama.” The very first person that my world has known that was flesh and blood.

I love him so because … just because.

He’s mine, that’s why.

Ben turns 6 today, and I am giving thanks for all these beautiful years of having him as mine.

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Ben's 6th_2

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Happy Birthday, Son! You’ll always have that special first place in my heart.

Ben at 6

(Self) Examination Happy days Milestones and growing up The darndest kid quotes and antics The Kao Kids

A lesson on beauty my children taught me

February 20, 2015

When there’s Chinese New Year, there’s always Miss Universe.

On free-to-air TV, that is.

I don’t know if anyone has realised this, but for the longest time, I’ve always caught snippets of this beauty pageant on Chinese New Year, since I was a kid.

Yesterday afternoon, after an exhausting stint of going from northeast to central to northwest and back to northeast of Singapore (also known as Chinese New Year obligations visitations), we went home to rest for the evening and I told the kids that the free-to-air channels sometimes show really hilarious Chinese movies about mahjong and kungfu during Chinese New Year.

We were curious, so we started flipping channels. And that was when we met the five finalists of the Miss Universe pageant.

Miss Universe 2015

Me: Ukraine. Miss Ukraine. She looks so perfect, like a Barbie doll.

Becks: Yucks. She’s not pretty at all.

Me: I don’t think we can even use the word ‘pretty’ to describe these women. They are beautiful. Oh, look! Miss Jamaica! Beautiful?

Ben, Becks and Nat: (in unison) No, not beautiful.

Me: How about Miss USA?

Ben: No lah, not beautiful.

Me: Miss Colombia? Oh my gosh, her teeth are so white. My goodness, such gorgeous curls.

Ben: Eeee…Why this girl doesn’t tie up her hair? So messy.

Me: Oh man, Miss Netherlands. Beautiful, right, Nat?

Nat: No. Not beautiful at all.

Me: Ok, guys, seriously. If you can’t call these women beautiful, I don’t know who you can call beautiful. These are the best in our world, you know. That’s why there’s this thing called beauty pageant. Tell me then, who is beautiful to you?

Ben, Becks and Nat: (in unison) YOU, Mama! YOU are beautiful.

Me: *speechless*

~~~

How pure the worlds of children. We all started grasping our idea of beauty through the people we love, until the media and our society defines what beauty is for us.

Last evening, I wore an invisible crown in the comfort of our home. No pageant, no competition, no gruelling Q and A, no swimsuit parade.

Just a simple declaration from the mouths of babes.

That I am the most beautiful in their universe.

Have an unbleatable Goat year, y'all! From the most beautiful mom to her kids and her three darlings

Have an unbleatable Goat year, y’all! From the most beautiful mom to her kids and her three darlings

Happy days Milestones and growing up Nat Kao The Kao Kids What to Expect... As a Mother

No party, but let’s party!

February 16, 2015

My littlest turns 3 on the 2nd day of Chinese New Year and in the midst of this apocalyptic craziness that happens once a year – cleaning, packing, stocking up, stashing food – I have almost forgotten all about it.

The older two both had a party thrown for them when they turned 3. I’m not an indulgent mom that throws a party for my kids every year, but I did tell myself that the kids should at least have a party at 1 (to thank well-meaning friends and relatives, and to celebrate making it through a year), at 3 (well, at least the kid is now aware of what’s happening and can really get excited about candle-blowing and the notion of having a party), at 6 (before P1!) and one at 12 (before the kid journeys into adolescence).

Or so I thought I would, but Nat turns 3 in 4 days’ time and Ben turns 6 next week, and I haven’t made any plans to throw them any parties.

These days running a business means working Mondays to Sundays, and every night from 10 pm to 1 am. The time I spend with my kids talking (and many times lecturing) is when we are in the car going to school and travelling home, and when we see each other again at dinner and tuck-in. What little energy that is left is spent reading bedtime stories and micro-managing all the small stuff in their lives – Consent forms for field trips! Parents’ newsletter from kindy! Mama, I need to start collecting toilet rolls for craft! Mama, my hair’s all tangled, can you tie for me? Mama, can we do colouring tomorrow?  Mama, buy strawberry milk we don’t like chocolate milk anymore, eww! – that the last thing I want to do is to think about party venue, decor, food and guest lists.

I’m feeling a little sorry for my youngest because he is the apple of my eye and the baby love to his siblings and he’s not getting a party. Three years ago, this darling was born after I had two suppositories inserted to induce my labour at 37 weeks. His arrival meant that our family is finally complete – since Fatherkao and I had always wanted to have three kids. We’ve had much more laughter ever since he came into our lives and rocked our world, and the trio of Kao kids has clocked hundreds of happy hours playing and having a blast together every day since he started joining them in all the fun.

Nat’s born with this ability of endearing himself to anyone. Those huge eyes and that innate manja-ness are the reasons why anyone would love – and give in to – him. I find my resolve always melting into nothingness when it comes to him, and I’m a little embarrassed to admit that with him all those principles I followed regarding discipline and training are thrown out of the window most of the time. Thankfully, the other half is more balanced and objective and doesn’t get swayed by those charming goldfish eyes.

This baby of mine turns three in four days.

How fast he has grown.

How much he has grown.

Nat Day 1

Nat and balloons

Nat and Mama's leg

Nat brushes his teeth

Nat at 2

Nat and rockets

And even though we’re not having a party, we would definitely be spending the day having HIS idea of fun.

Which is to be together – korkor, jiejie, Mama, Dada and him – the whole day long.

Happy 3rd birthday, my Glutinous Rice Ball. You’ll always have my elbow to pinch so you can fall asleep, my tummy to blow raspberries into for a hearty laugh, and my legs to cling on to when you’re afraid.

Nat at kelong

 

(Self) Examination Getting all sentimental now Milestones and growing up The Kao Kids The real supermom

Memory Lane

February 12, 2015

Recently, a reporter from the papers rang me up to ask if she could do a story about what motherhood is like, having three kids so close in age. She then asked me some routine questions so she could find the interest angle in my story. I don’t know if what I shared would end up as a feature in the papers, but talking to her sure brought back a flood of memories.

Memories – though somewhat a little hazy now – of how I discovered I was pregnant after Ben was barely nine months, and having to deal with a very horrible, terrible, no good first trimester of wretching, wretching and more wretching, always feeling so sorry that I couldn’t last longer breastfeeding Ben (and to think I even wanted to try tandem feeding!) …

Memories of how tough being pregnant in the last trimester was, with a toddling toddler in tow, and being every bit the hands-on mom that I am, doing everything for him (and refusing to let the domestic helper do what a mother should do) …

Ben at Year 1

Memories of how Becks was such a difficult baby refusing to latch, Ben graduating from infantcare to toddler class at daycare, and me breaking down like a wreck seeing how hard he cried at our separation every morning after his sister was born …

Ben with Becks at Year 1

And memories of how the road to having an infant and a toddler was made even tougher when my husband broke his leg and was out of commission for the following half of the year…

And then discovering that I was pregnant again when Becks was transiting to solids well and learning to toddle like a pro…

Becks Toddling

Becks Year 1

To realise that the moment Nat was born it was almost an automatic given that Becks would enter her Terrible Twos, albeit half a year earlier …

And then I suddenly had in my hands – gosh, not enough hands! – two toddlers and one infant …

KaoKids7

And that when they were in childcare and infantcare, and falling sick quite often with germs having a heyday in the house, I had used up all my leave, my savings, and my energy …

Nat 3 Months

Nat 6 Months

Those years were insane years.

And then I was asked the question: if I could do it all over again, would I at least try to space them further apart? Or maybe… stop at two…?

And a deluge of sentimentality hit me so hard it took me quite a while to recover. While I sounded composed and did all my polite laughs, I was choking on the inside.

Those years were hard. Those years were crazy. What was I thinking?

But these faces.

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These children today, at 6, 5 and 3, and the bond that they share being each other’s best friends, is the reason I say makes everything worthwhile.

I would do three kids, 18 months apart, in a heartbeat. My world has never known otherwise, and yet my world has been made complete with the three children I have today.

It has been one hell of a mad, mad ride, but it’s totally worth it.

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Becks Kao Happy days Milestones and growing up Re: learning and child training

This little girl of mine (and it’s got to do with nail polish again)

February 6, 2015

So you’ve read that I finally relented and relaxed my standards when it comes to nail polish for my little girl.

Last month, I did the unthinkable.

During one of our mother-and-daughter dates out, I brought Becks to a place that would satisfy her curiosity and gratify her desires.

I didn’t want to do the usual let’s go eat and walk around gig with her for our “Special Time”. I thought this would be a good opportunity to show her that Mama doesn’t go for a pedicure (or manicure) to ONLY put colour on her nails. I wanted her to see that sometimes, we pay the professionals to do some grooming for us, like scrubbing the calluses off our soles, trimming in-growns and scrubbing our elbows.

And so I let her experience that for herself.

Becks and Mama Date Night 1

The ladies there were shocked, of course. I don’t think any mom has ever brought a little girl this young to to do a full two-hour spa pedicure and manicure. They said moms bring their girls to get nail polish, and that’s it. Becks got a lot of attention that evening, since the place was located right smacked in a mall where human traffic was ongoing. People pointed, people squealed, and I am sure some moms who uphold moral perfection balked. I know I would, if it was me a month ago.

You didn’t want your daughter to be vain, and now you’re showing her how to be more vain?

No, I didn’t think I was teaching or showing her to embrace vanity more; on the contrary, besides telling her ever so often that beauty comes from a kind heart, I was teaching her on our date that we don’t just colour our nails with markers and highlighters or do nail art with stickers and stamps. We groom ourselves, and we do it right by taking care of every part with respect.

Becks and Mama Date Night 2

Becks and Mama Date Night 3

Becks and Mama Date Night 4

Becks and Mama Date Night 6

Becks and Mama Date Night 5

That night, she saw how the jie-jies cleaned and scrubbed and trim and cut, and even though she did eventually get nail polish on (which I removed the next day in time for school), she learned a precious lesson.

“Mama, we clean ourselves properly. Cannot anyhow draw on our nails.”

That’s one sensible girl, and one happy Mama.

Ben Kao Everyday fun! Milestones and growing up

Six is the age of…

January 28, 2015

… Scowling at injustice with a big, big sense of right and wrong

Here he is, very upset that he is the only boy in his group. He says his teacher did the WRONG thing.

Here Ben is very upset that he is the only boy in his group. He says his teacher did the WRONG thing.

… Sulking every day on the way to school complaining to Mom about girls and telling her how much you hate them

"I don't want to go to school, Mama. I hate girls."

“I don’t want to go to school, Mama. I hate girls.”

… Singing your lungs out in the shower and doing the boogie woogie while at it

The noisiest part of his day, and mine

The noisiest part of his day, and mine

…And staging a water battle for German and American soldiers while you’re at it

Drowned comrades

Drowned comrades

… Needing to look cool all the time

So the sunglasses need to match the outfit...

So the sunglasses need to match the outfit…

…Wanting – not a pet dog, a pet kitten, but a pet JAGUAR

Security blanket every night

Security blanket every night

… Making a mess with your Lego and turning a deaf ear to Mom’s nagging about bricks hurting her feet (like, who cares?)

It's painful? Really? If you stepped on a brick?

It’s painful? Really? If you stepped on a brick?

… Being extremely creative, with tons of mischief up your sleeve

Making Running Man nametags and making himself a spy

Making Running Man nametags and making himself a spy

…Wanting many moments of being all alone to create something massive

"Leave me alone to make my Lego," so says someone

“Leave me alone to make my Lego,” so says someone

… Leading the pack

"Shall we play MAGIC TRAIN, guys?"

“Shall we play MAGIC TRAIN, guys?”

… Having no fear

This is just a vampire. What's so scary?

This is just a vampire. What’s so scary?

… Having intense conversations with friends, and wanting to be with older boys

Playing BrainBox with Gabriel, his bff for now

Playing BrainBox with Gabriel, his bff for now

…. Monkeying with Mom and loving every minute of it

Ba ba ba... ba ba NA NA!

Ba ba ba… ba ba NA NA!

6 years ago, this boy entered my world. A leaking water bag and almost 14 laborious hours later, I met the gentlest, sweetest, baby who came to rock my world.

And rock my world he did. Every. Single. Day.

I love you, Son. Every. Single. Day.