Negotiating new terrains

February 8, 2016

2016 is a year of new beginnings.

The motherhood terrain is looking incredibly different. The landscape ahead is looking craggy and filled with highlands and alpines. For one, I’ve got a primary-school-goer this year, and that itself is changing the motherhood game completely. The academic pressure is building up, slowly but surely, and I’m beginning to get glimpses of angst, outbursts of annoyance and many occasions of arguing and bickering (the firstborn with me, his siblings, his father, and just about everyone he is familiar with). Not to mention the sporadic emo-ing complete with the sometimes pensive, otherwise sulking face looking out into nothingness which makes me DREAD the tween years which I imagine would draw nearer than I think.

And am I the only parent who is fighting a losing battle against technology? For the longest time I have kept Ben occupied with books, LEGO, crafts and sports but these days he’s been begging me for a mobile phone to play Minecraft because everyone plays Minecraft, he says.

Then there’s the other two preschoolers, one in K2 this year and the other in Nursery (and both almost at the same height now I get questions like ‘Are they twins?’ everywhere I go). They are plonked into a new kindergarten with an amazing accelerated curriculum I don’t even know if I should laugh or cry. The K2 is learning how to use Google at computer class and learning words about the rainforest I only picked up in Geog in Secondary 2. Her tingxie phrases are pegged at Primary 3 levels, and while her Primary 1 brother is being tested the spelling of pronouns like ‘she’, ‘he’, ‘they’, ‘we’, she needs to figure out how to blend and spell the different layers of the rainforest from forest floor and understory to the emergent and canopy layers. The good thing is, after a month of being in the new kindy, she’s so much more vocal and confident, and speaks Mandarin with more ease and poise than she did a month ago. Which is the reason why I am undecided if I should laugh or cry in her case because while it is such a pain taking her through her weekly spelling tests and homework, I am seeing a much more outspoken girl who enjoys going to school.

The littlest is 4 this year and he is so mature for his age, I don’t even recognise this baby anymore. He probably has 6000 words in his vocabulary now, and knows all the names of his favourite dinosaurs, Star Wars characters and just about every thing under the sun. He loves to read and write, and wishes to outdo his sister all the time (which is partly due to that super ‘on’ new kindergarten!). He argues his way out of trouble and is able to give a ton of reasons why things happen, and I find myself dealing with an even more intelligent version of my firstborn when he was 4 – which makes this motherhood gig more exhausting now than ever. Nat, oh Nat, where has my baby boy gone?

2016 also marks the year of embarking on yet another entrepreneurship journey. One chance meeting and almost a full year of incubating an idea from seed to fruition later, and I now have a 5th “baby”, one that I’ve always dreamt of having. As an educator, I have stood in almost every classroom in every possible setting – as a relief teacher in a primary school during undergrad days, an English and Literature teacher in my practicum days, as a JC lecturer and tutor for almost 7 years and as an adjunct lecturer in NIE just one year after leaving the civil service – but none was as rewarding as the “classroom” which I homeschooled the kids in where we practically explored everything we wanted to. That classroom was the most challenging yet most fulfilling, because little did I know this when I stayed home with my kids – that I was protecting their right to play; because in play, they learn the most. I was present for them in their growing years, and facilitated those precious learning hours through play as a present parent.

Which is why I’m replicating the experience I had with the kids at Trehaus.

Trehaus is the dream that my co-founders and I have always wished existed – to be present for our children and to create a place where work and play would never have to be mutually exclusive.

And so I’ve stepped onboard full time as a co-founder to direct the programmes we roll out at Trehaus, embracing the play philosophy for young children, and making work-life-balance less of a myth and more of a reality. And I am proud to declare ‘acheivement unlocked‘ for pressing on in this steep climb up the start-up route once again to bring what we’ve dreamed of to life. It didn’t come easy but we started. And I am treasuring this opportunity to educate and make a difference. I’ve stayed home for the kids and now, for a change, they will be coming to work with me.

To mark the changes for the year, the blog’s gone through a revamp too! As with life, nothing remains static. I’ve said my goodbyes (boo hoo!) to the days of diapering and breastfeeding. I no longer have toddlers with snoot to wipe off, boo-boos to kiss and toothless grins to play peek-a-boo with. This blogspace will now chronicle the new milestones I experience as a mother, the challenges I face going back to full-time work and my thoughts about topics close to my heart: of education, play, creativity and learning. And while I negotiate new terrains, I hope you will stick around and share this journey with me, as I would like to learn from you too. It’s going to be helluva ride, this year, I’m so sure of that!