On the bus one day on our way to kindy…

Becks: (singing) Cop the Builder… yea yea yea… Cop the Builder…

Preschooler boy seated in front: (singing louder) Bob the Builder, can we fix it! Bob the Builder, yes we can! Bob the builder, can we fix it… Bob the Builder….

Becks: Mama, I’m singing…

Me: Yes, I know.

Becks: But the boy is also singing.

Me: But well, he’s singing the right thing, my dear.

Becks: HEY YOU! COPYBOY!

Me: *facepalm*

 

Someday, I’ll be different, Mom.

Becks: When I grow up to be a boy, I’ll do what kor kor do. I can pass urine like him.

Me: WHAT???

Becks: I SAID, I will be a boy WHEN I GROW UP! Then I can stand up to pass urine!

Me: The truth is, you’ll grow up to be a lady. You will not be a boy. And you will NOT stand up to pass urine.

Becks: Then I don’t friend you.

Me: ???

*For the record, my little girl refuses to squat to pee. She stands up to do it (while in the shower) and I caught her trying to use the urinal yesterday.

 

Please be ladylike

Me: Goodnight, Becks. Close your eyes and sleep.

Becks: Goodnight, Mama. Ok, Mama.

Me: What are you doing? I said close your eyes and sleep. Why are you lifting up your shirt?

Becks: (inaudible babble)

Me: You’re a lady for crying out loud. How many times have I told you not to lift up your shirt?

Becks: Shhh! I’m feeding my babies la!!

Me: *facepalm*