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Becks Kao Milestones and growing up The darndest kid quotes and antics
Return of Lil’ Miss Bossy Becks
February 4, 2013You really need to live with us to know how this little girl bosses us around every day. Here’s just a glimpse of what happens on a daily basis.
You better make sure
Fatherkao had just returned home from a hard day’s work…
Becks: Are you going to bathe?
Fatherkao: Yes
Becks: Make sure you wash your face!
Fatherkao: Ok
Becks: Make sure you wash your hair!
Fatherkao: Ok
Becks: Make sure you pass urine!
Fatherkao: ??!!!???!!!
Little Miss B, the disciplinarian
Becks: Ok, let’s play this game! (takes out the Angry Birds 3D game set)
Nat: Urgwakkkaaaa (proceeds to destroy what she’s laid out)
Becks: Ooi, didi!! WASSUP? You dare to make a mess! Do you want me to discipline you?
Me: *facepalm*
Hair Affair
Becks: Mama, can I comb your hair?
Me: Since it’s a question, can I say no? Every time you comb my hair, you yank it and it hurts.
Becks: MAMA, I WANT TO COMB YOUR HAIR!
Me: WHY??
Becks: Because it’s TOO LONG!
Me: -_-
Lil’ Bossy Becks and her ultimate cuteness
Everyday fun! The darndest kid quotes and antics The Kao Kids
Rawr-ing shoot-a-dino fun
January 30, 2013A few days ago, fatherkao started using all the cardboard we collected from bulk ordering the kids’ diapers and milk powder, transforming them into standing paper dinosaurs.
The kids were thrilled to be asked to help. So they went crazy, of course; they were on the roll, literally. They used up ROLLS of scotch tape to help make those standees. And make, they did. The three of them made a HUGE bag of these target boards.
Along the way, Becks also got distracted and starting taping the whole house, one wall at a time. Thanks to her, I am still discovering sticky tape everywhere and peeling them off till today.
The next thing I knew, my house became Jurassic Park that’s got dinos on the loose but stupid enough to stand in line to be shot – and my kids were shooting them silly with the Nerf guns they’ve gotten for Christmas.
And after each dino was shot, an even scarier baby-monster-dino by the name of Nat would gum them down and tear them apart with his bare hands.
Big Papa Dino Hunter then comes along with his super-duper-ultra machine gun to obliterate them all.
They do the victory laugh together. Muahahahaha, hurray for the Kao dino hunters!
Becks Kao Learning fun! Milestones and growing up The darndest kid quotes and antics
Little blue and little yellow (plates), by Becks Kao
January 26, 2013My kids love Leo Lionni’s little blue and little yellow, a cute story of how two best friends discover something amazing happens when they hug. They make me read the story again and again, in English and Chinese (mostly in English), and remain ever so fascinated by the simplicity of how blue and yellow can give us the colour green.
Just last weekend, my daughter decided to skip her nap, and while all of us were fast asleep, she took hold of my craft box, selected blue and yellow paint from my stash, and went wild mixing the colours on paper plates.
Little Blue & Little Yellow, by Becks Kao
When I got up, she saw me and went, “See, Mama! Little Blue and Little Yellow!” I went beserk initially at the mess and the fact that she ransacked what was forbidden to her, but calmed down quickly cos’ what she did, well, it was kinda cute. I would have never allowed her to do this while I am awake so it was good that she did it while I was sleeping!
Bento Attempts Parenting 101 The darndest kid quotes and antics The Kao Kids
A nugget of junk
January 21, 2013I’m not sure if I’m winning or losing the mealtime battle. It’s getting a little complicated.
Although portions still go unfinished and I end up spoonfeeding almost 99% of all their meals at home, the kids have shown me some things that have shocked me:
They would choose Cheerios over Honey Stars, anytime. (For the uninitiated, Cheerios have no taste. It’s just bland multigrain cereal. Honey Stars are sweet, and taste like, erm, honey.)
They finish cherry tomatoes by the tens in seconds.
They love broccoli, cauliflower and edamame.
They’ve tried curry and like it.
They’ll eat fries, yes they would, but would automatically stop at the tenth or eleventh fry handed to them.
Just last weekend, I thought I’d prepare something special and indulge them a little. I made angelhair aglio olio with salted butter, ham, bacon and tomatoes. I baked salmon with some rosemary and olive oil. I reheated a ready-made pack of clam chowder. I toasted some chicken nuggets and even made a guacamole dip for that.
I’d thought they would gun for the nuggets and ask for more. To my surprise, the cheddar cheese on the pasta was finished first, followed by the cherry tomatoes. The salmon was overcooked so it wasn’t too popular. The clam chowder was slurped in a jiffy. Ben tried the dip and declared he wasn’t a fan. They struggled to finish their portion of the angelhair pasta and they did manage to finish their carbs with the ham and bacon after almost forty-five minutes of spoonfeeding. But what was most surprising was that both of them refused to bite into the chicken nugget. They’ve tried nuggets before and the last was at the Christmas party at their school. But this time round, they were gagging and saying no vehemently. Jamie Oliver would be proud.
I don’t believe it, my kids rejected nuggets.
So tell me, is this battle won or lost? They aren’t eating the variety and the portions I would like them to, but hey, they’re rejecting junk. That should be good news eh?
Ben: (after school one evening) I don’t want to play with my toys today.
Fatherkao: Why?
Ben: Because I don’t want to keep them. Every day ah, I play then I need to keep. Today I don’t want to keep.
Me: (to myself) Right, let’s see how long you can hold out.
~~~
* WTBW: Welcome to Ben’s World
Becks Kao Ben Kao Going Out! Happy days The darndest kid quotes and antics
The supermarket adventures of the conehead duo
January 10, 2013One of the things I find extremely therapeutic is to push a trolley down supermarket aisles. Before I had kids, I looked forward to that quite a bit every week.
Now with three kids in tow, grocery shopping is a whole new experience altogether. When we do lug the kids along, there’s just so much to do. I can no longer zone out and just look at things. I gotta strategise and plan my shopping route. Get the items on the checklist. Check out the weekly offers to stock up. Dettol, detergent, toilet paper, tissue boxes, frozen food, wet wipes, fresh milk, tofu and Sakura chicken – grab these standard items every trip and stock ’em all up if they are cheap. I gotta make sure all bladders (mine included) are emptied before the kids are chucked in the trolley. I gotta make sure they keep their fingers to themselves and have enough entertainment to last about an hour while I push around at breakneck speed.
Sometimes, I break up fights and end up pushing two trolleys, a mean feat if I’m alone; a meaner one if I’m alone and wearing the baby. Some days I abandon all groceries and flail my arms like an insane woman if one of them has to poo or pee. But now with experience and tricks to avert disaster under my sleeves, I’d get them some ice-cream or finger food to eat so they’d sit quietly in the trolley for a good 15 minutes.
Going to the supermarket is spelled F-U-N for Ben and Becks. They’ve had much fun sampling all sorts of finger food, melting aunties’ hearts by cheekily waving and saying hi to random strangers, pinched and stabbed their fingers into tomatoes, carrots, apples and mushrooms, squealed at live crabs, butchered frog legs and fishes awaiting their deaths in the tanks, and playing with plastic bags, using them as gloves, socks and helmets. Yes, apologies to my tree hugging friends, but I’ve resorted to giving them plastic bags to play with to keep them out of mischief.
Yesterday, everyone who saw them in the trolley did a little giggle and gave me a sympathetic nod.
These two alien coneheads made their day, I’m sure. They made mine too. I wouldn’t say it’s therapeutic now but I’m certainly laughing a lot more bringing them out grocery shopping.
P/S: We know the risk of giving a plastic bag to a child and have explained to the kids about the danger of suffocation. Which is why they did a “Look Ma, it’s on our heads and not over our faces – duh!”.
My iPhone and iPad are two items I protect with all my life from my children. They don’t play games or watch anything from these gadgets. They don’t know my passcode even though they technically know how to unlock them. They swipe and swipe and enter all sorts of random numbers (and sometimes disabling my phone!) but they’ll never get to use any apps.
Until lately, they discovered that they could go ask other people for their phones using the excuse that they’d like to have a picture with them. These are smart kids, I tell you.
So my BFFs, and all the other aunties and uncles, grandpa and grandmas end up being suckered by Ben and Becks. Of course, my kids end up making their day cos’ these happy folks get to upload a ton of pictures on fb with smiling pictures of themselves posing with my kids.
Lately, Ben has also discovered the camera and what he could do with it. Last Saturday, at my cousin’s wedding dinner, while I was busy chatting with my cousin at my table, my son who must have been bored to his last toe asked if he could have my phone.
I just checked my phone today and found out he took 300 over shots of himself without even needing my passcode to unlock the phone! He’s meddled with people’s phones enough to learn how to use the camera and toggle to snap pictures of himself.
So I scroll through pictures of his socked foot, his sneakers, his silly faces, his fingers, the steamed garoupa on his plate, the chandelier on the ceiling and my skirt!
‘Gawd! They start camwhoring young!
Ben Kao Food, glorious food! The darndest kid quotes and antics
Things you didn’t know about a dragon fruit
December 16, 2012Ben: Mama, how do we get dragon fruit?
Me: Erm, I think I bought it from the supermarket?
Ben: No, how does it grow and grow?
Me: From a tree?
Ben: No, I tell you, they kill those dragonflies and make them into dragon fruit!
~~~
A while later…
Ben: Mama, I finished my breakfast and all the dragon fruit, bread and cheese.
Me: That’s good.
Ben: But I didn’t eat those black black things.
Me: You mean the dragon fruit seeds?
Ben: Yes. I’m scared that if I bite them, they will burst out baby dragonflies.
~~~
What the kids had for breakfast today!
Becks Kao Milestones and growing up The darndest kid quotes and antics
Little Miss B #2
November 17, 2012Remember Little Miss Bossy? She’s back, bossier than ever.
Blooding plaster
Ben, my eldest, loves the plaster. He loves those with cartoon animals and Disney characters, and would find every reason to use one. He usually has more bruises from knocking into things than cuts on his fingers / toes / hands / feet, so he hardly ever needs a plaster for anything. Lately, he’s been peeling skin off where his fingernails are just so he can use a plaster.
Ben: Mama, I need to use a plaster. See?
Me: Oh, you have broken skin.
Ben: So I can use one?
Becks: Mama, look, kor kor is BLOODING. Give him plaster!
Me: Yes, ok. He is not really bleeding but yes, I will give him one. Sigh.
Breast is certainly Best
The older kids know that a baby nurses from his mother’s breasts and I unapologetically explain to them how this happens. Ever since then, there’s been endless nipple and boob jokes going around the house, which usually involves them trying to feed their little stuff toy “babies” and imitating me.
Becks: Mama, you finished bathing?
Me: Yes, my dear.
Becks: You still have your breasts?
Me: Yes, my dear.
Becks: You still have milk?
Me: Yes, my dear.
Becks: GO FEED di di. He’s hungry!
Me: Yes, my dear.
Footwear Fuss
My little princess is beginning to explore walking in other people’s shoes, literally. She loves to go to the shoe rack near the main door and put on footwear of every kind, from her father’s loafers to my four-inch heels.
Becks: Mama, is this correct? (referring to the way she’s worn my sandals)
Me: Yes, but these are not yours. I want to wear them out later.
Becks: Is this correct or not?
Me: Yes, they are on the correct foot, but these aren’t yours.
Becks: No, these are mine. It’s correct.
Me: Sigh.